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now playing: Don't Watch Me Cry
Oh, it hurts the most 'cause I don't know the cause Maybe I shouldn't have cried when you left and told me not to wait Oh, it kills the most to say that I still care Now I'm left tryna rewind the times you held and kissed me there
I picked up my pencil and began writing the first thing that came to my mind, my writers block going away.
Dear Y/N, I really don't know how to start this letter. It's been year since we've talked, and I would've called or texted but that didn't seem as personal. I wish we could've had more time together you know, as a couple. The media's been on my back looking for a new lover for me. Sometimes I want to tell them that we are getting back together but then I have to remember that you've probably moved on when I haven't. Don't get me wrong, I've tried dating again but it's hard when I thought that you were gonna be my forever. It's funny, sometimes I reach out for your hand when the press find me somewhere only to realise that you're probably halfway across the country. I guess that shows just how much of an impact on me you've had on me over the course of our relationship. To be honest the amount of courage it took to write this letter surprises me considering yesterday I spent the whole day trying to block you out of my mind. Never, have I ever felt this way about a person before you. Most of the time, I space out during interviews because I remember the times when you would cuddle up in my arms while I recorded music. You never failed to make me feel wanted and reminded me that I was beautiful. My family and friends are here to comfort me but I you are the reason that I'm here today. And now, after all this time I know why you left. I didn't give you the attention that you deserved, I neglected you and please believe me when I say that it was never my intention to make you feel this way. Before I stop I have a question.
Do you want me the way I want you? Please answer this or I don't know what I'll do.
Missing you deeply, Jorja
I placed my pencil down on my desk and placed it an envelope. I wrote down her address that I had acquired from her friend. Right on time the mail man hand dropped off a package just as I had opened the door.
I silently handed him the envelope.
I swiftly turned around and walked back into my house closing the door behind me I fell to the ground and immediately started crying remembering something I said to her before she left.
