Lost Luna

lonesome

adjective ~ sad or dejected because of lack of companionship or separation from others

Another two weeks went by in a slow and painful blur. I became tired easily with all the exercise but could not sleep. Food became unappealing with my mood shift.

Sean was busy with his latest duties so we didn't train privately together anymore. They left me to work out on my own, or as part of the female group, but I had no motivation most days.

Molly often came round to see me in the evening after she finished work. She had taken up a full-time job in the local clothes store. They sold and repaired clothes, and she was actually not a bad seamstress.

But other than that, I felt lonely. The days when I was stuck inside became dark. I started to draw again, using mostly shades of grey, my pictures dark and brooding. I had many scattered across my desk and my floor, but I was too lazy to organise them.

I had just woke from yet another drawing daydream. A glance at the clock told me it was nearly dinner time. Molly finished work at six, so I usually met her in the dining room. I tried to get there first, so she didn't get suspicious that I wasn't eating much. That way I could say I ate before she came and only wanted a snack. Sean wasn't around anymore to rat me out, so that was a bonus, too.

I fixed my hair with a sigh and adjusted the extra-large t-shirt I wore. It was covered in paint, but I didn't mind since I wouldn't be downstairs for long.

I don't know why I felt this way, but no matter what I did, I couldn't sleep at night.

I didn't lock my bedroom door behind me as I made my way downstairs. It was nearing six now, so the dining room was going to get fairly busy soon. I crept my way through a few people and headed for the fridge. I grabbed a bottle of water before turning to the spread of food left out.

The chefs only made one meal a day on weekdays, and that was dinner. Weekends were usually breakfast and dinner. Today seemed to be a buffet. Different rice and noodle dishes, curries, chicken, beef, soups, Chinese pancakes...

I hummed as I glanced at all of them before deciding on a small bowl of chicken noodle soup. I took a spoon and went to make my way over to my usual spot when I saw someone sitting there. I hesitated mid-stride and narrowed my eyes at Sean's overly large back.

"Are you gonna sit down or you just gonna keep staring at me?" He mused.

I grumbled, but made my way around the table to sit in front of him. He eyed my bowl of soup with a frown before taking in my appearance. When his eyes finally settled on mine, I was hoping he would be wary of my glower, but he just frowned back at me.

"You're slacking." He growled.

I blinked, taken aback at his tone. Sean never got harsh with me.

"You're not looking after yourself, Nova. Don't think I haven't been keeping tabs on you. Alpha specifically requested I monitor you, even if they are not my eyes." He grumbled.

"What?"

"You're skipping meals, not working out. When's the last time you washed your hair?" He raised an eyebrow.

I went to retort with a comment of my own but found myself dumbfounded by the fact other wolves have been watching me.

"You can't talk. You left me alone." I grimaced.

He sighed and dropped the harshness. "I have so many more duties now. The one-to-one sessions will have to wait until I have more time. The pack is under a lot of pressure."

"Yeah, I know. Beta Charlie told me." I grumbled.

"When did you last speak with him?" He wondered.

I shrugged. "He takes me hunting every three days."