You are the only one | Phan

The First Cut

"Oh, thats great Dan... I'm really happy for you..." Dan wasn't conviced.

"You don't sound very happy Phil. You should be pleased for me!" Dan snapped.

"I am pleased for you! It's just I-"

"Its just what Phil!? Not good enough for you?! Well, I'm SORRY to rain on your parade, but I have a date to go to!" Dan shouted at the top of his lungs.

He then stormed off to the counter, snatched his coat and walked of the door; slamming it behind him. Phil was shook. Dan had never, ever spoke to Phil like that. The flat turned quite and empty. Phil standing in the middle of the living room, sobbing into his long green sleeved jumper.  He ran into the kitchen opening a cupboard door. He quickly reached inside and snatched an object off of the top shelf, shoving it into his deep pocket. He then proceeded and ran to his room, locking the door behind him. He laid on his bed hugging his pillow, pretending it was Dan's body and cried into it, making it damp. For at least twenty minutes Phil laid there crying. He couldn't get over it. Sitting up he slowly grabbed the object in his pocket and rolled up his left sleeve.

'This is the only thing that will make me feel better. I can't handle this anymore... My pain has to go... I mean, everyone does it... Why can't I?'

He raised the pair of scissors to his wrist, hessitating. He lighty ran the blade of the scissors around his wrist calming himself.

'Come on Phil, you can do this. This is for your own sake.'

Phil started to slash the blade onto his wrist, quincing with every cut. The tears rolled out of his eyes once more, blurring his poor vision. He didn't care. He didn't care about anyone now. He pressed the blade deeper into his skin. Blood dripping onto his freshly made quilts. Slowly he started cut his way up his arm, still quincing and feeling more and more pain. He stopped and wipped his tears away with the corner of his sleeve. His arm was nothing more than blood and deep cuts.

"What have I done?!" He shouted at himself as he roze from the bed, and ran into the bathroom as quickly as he could.

The sink was already covered in blood before he even turned on the tap. Quickly the boy turned the tap on and ran his arm under the flow of cold water. He clenched his fist at the pain, forcing more blood to come rushing out of his arm. He bit his lip so hard it went bright red. Again, he didn't care. He unraveled some tissue and smeered it on his arm. His arm was dreadful.

"I'm such an idiot! Once again, that good old Philip who never got a date, screwed up!" He leant his back to the wall and sank to the floor. He slowly stroked the cuts and wondered...

"Maybe Dan wouldn't care if I wasn't here... Maybe he was better off without me."