Forbidden Love [bwwm interracial]

Chapter 11- 21 Questions

Jonathan's POV

She didn't know I'd been watching her, but I had.

I watched the way she ate.

The way she walked.

The way she talked.

And I didn't know why, but I found myself more and more interested in her. I was past interested–I was intrigued.

Her smile.

Her laugh.

No matter how hard I tried to ignore it, I couldn't help the way my heart skipped a beat when she entered a room. The way a smile etched itself upon my face when she had a witty reply to my jokes.

I couldn't ignore the feelings I had for this girl.

For as long as I could remember, I hadn't cared about anybody or anything. As Liv would say, I was a manwhore, and before I was fine with that. But ever since she moved in, I found myself spending my nights alone–no one night stand lying next to me when I woke up. I hadn't cared about them. I didn't care about the tears they shed when I woke them up in the morning and told them they had to leave.

But I found myself caring about her. I had developed feelings for this dark-skinned beauty and I didn't know what I was doing.

I wouldn't call it love but I wouldn't call it lust. Don't get me wrong–I would love the chance to rock her world, but I cared for her enough to respect the fact that she wasn't that type of girl.

It wasn't infatuation but it wasn't love...like maybe?

Like seems more fitting of a description of what I was feeling, right?

Here's what I didn't like.

I didn't like the way she locked herself in her room and cried at nights for God knows what. I assumed she was crying over the loss of her apartment and the bills she would have to pay for it.

I didn't like how she made it seem like me buying her clothes was such a big deal. I had seen her closet–it was practically barren. Other than work clothes and t-shirts, she didn't have much clothes. Plus didn't women like men spending money on them?

I didn't like how she got upset when I picked her up from work. Those public buses she insisted on riding weren't safe and I really didn't feel comfortable with her sitting next to some creep on it.

I really didn't like how she yelled at the television when she didn't like something that was happening. She seemed not to realize that they couldn't hear her and yelling wouldn't change anything.

I didn't like how stubborn she was. She was so hard-headed that it was infuriating, yet so fascinating. She's said no to me more times in the past month than I've heard in my whole life.

What I really, really didn't like was how she couldn't see how gorgeous she was. I saw the way her head fell as we entered that shop earlier. She was so beautiful and she had no confidence in herself.

I loved how big she smiled as she tried on the clothes and mockingly modeled for me. I hated how she let her whole day be ruined by that one ignorant, inconsiderate employee.

This girl deserved more credit than she got. We joked around way more than we should, but those times we had a serious conversation I had learned she was an extremely intelligent young woman.

From the moment I invited her in, I knew that it was one of the best decisions of my entire life and I didn't regret it one bit.

"Hey Liv," I called as I pushed open her room door, "Can I talk to you?"