I feel horrible. Honestly, I feel like this all the time, every step of my life. Reason? I don't know. Maybe my 'eighth grade depression' hasn't gone anywhere. I just learned to suppress it within me because feeling the way I feel at every point in your life sucks a lot.
How do I feel? Horrible. Guilty. Like I am a monster who keeps hurting everyone. Bad. Like an idiot.
The worst part is sometimes it all comes out in one blow. I don't know what triggers it to come out, maybe another panic attack or just life being a bitch again. But sometimes it can't stay inside you and so it comes all out in the process of which it hurts everyone but most of all it hurts you. You didn't want anyone to feel bad, for you or otherwise, that's the whole reason you had suppressed all of it in the first place. Sow hen it does get out, you feel like you should just stop breathing for everyone's sake if not yours. You want to cease to exist.
YOU ARE READING
Life in a nutshell.
SachbücherPlease be careful around me. Sometimes I am sad and I don't even know why. "You can deal with it if you try." I can't. I have tried. "Have you ever tried not being depressed?" Huh. It's that simple. I am an idiot. "Jake has cancer and he is alway...
