The Shadow's Mate.

Chapter 8

Everbody needs insperation

Everybody needs a song

A beautiful melody

When the nights are long

Cause there is no gurantee

That this life is easy

Yeah, when my world is falling apart

When there's no light to break out the dark

That's when I

Look at you

When I Look At You - Miley Cyrus

***

I miss him.

It has been a week and a half and I still don't know if he has survived.

I am currently sitting in a different room than the one Sebastian and his father trashed a week and a half ago.

Snippets of what Sebastian did to his father keep replaying in my head but I make it key to focus on Josh and Hawke.

Speaking of Josh, he's been a good and clever little boy, understanding somewhat when I tell him to call me 'mama' instead of 'Zawa'.

He lies on the king sized four-poster bed and I stand with my back placed against the window, watching his chest rise and fall.

I haven't seen Sebastian since he fought with his father but I miss him and I hate that I miss him.

A monster.

The son of the man who nearly killed me the night my parents died.

Lily waltzes though the door as per usual this time of day as she does everyday, bringing me and Josh food.

"Afternoon, Zara." She smiles politely at me.

I don't reply, as usual.

After all my escaping attempts, I now have a guard at the bottom of my window and outside my door.

I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for Lily.

My plan worked perfectlty until she spotted me at the borders of their land, apparently she was on look-out duties.

After pleading with her to let me go, she ratted me out anyway.

She sighs, placing the tray of food on the coffee table near the couch, "You are going to have to talk to me eventually, Zara."

I prefer eventually to now. I mutter mentally.

Josh's nose flare as he sniff's the steaming hot lasanga, his eyes peeling open as he energetically sits up. His eyes scan the room for it and when he spots the food on the table, he licks his lips greedily, jumps off the bed and walks towards the heavenly scent.

When he reaches his destination, he doesn't even pick up a fork, his tiny hands grab fistfulls of cheese, minced meat and sauce and he pushes it into his gaping mouth.

I stare at him disapprovingly.

How dare he?

I just changed his outfit after breakfast now he is making himself dirty again.

Unbelievable!

Babies.

Josh continues to stuff his face as tomato sauce covers his hands and mouth and splatters of redish-orangish liquid are visible on his T-shirt and trousers.

It looks disgusting, like blood and guts. He looks like he is consuming human organs and -

My stomach starts swirling and my throat feels heavy.

Oh god, not again!

I hold my stomach with one hand and put the other over my mouth, covering my nose at the same time.

I rush pass Lily as she stands in the way of the bathroom and haul myself over the toilet pot just in time as the chunks and liquids push pass my throat and exits my mouth.

I feel soft, delicate hands rub my back, cooing 'Let it all out, honey' over and over again until I am done.

I brush my teeth, barely acknowledging Lily as she asks if I need anything.

Throwing up makes me feel weak and empty as though I have wasted all my energy vomiting.

I feel so exhausted.

"Zara!" Lily shouts alarmingly.

But I am too late to realise what is happening. As my shoulder blades connect with the carpeted floor, darkness welcomes me immediately.