Update hoesss.
Tw-
Sad Raiden in the zone.
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Raiden just sat there drinking a juice box, he was thinking about it for a while, quitting volleyball, kageyama didn't need him and the only team that liked him was back in America, he felt so alone.
He was having these stupid memories he couldn't control and it hurt him, maybe he shouldn't have come back to Japan, what was he even thinking. He shouldn't have fulfilled that stupid promise he even forgot. He had been getting texts from him everyday and that just fueled his anger.
He was replaced for hyper orange, was it because he was listless, is it because he didn't have energy? Is that why Kageyama didn't love him anymore.
Who is he kidding, it was six years ago, he wasn't even supposed to be playing he promised his couch he wouldn't play no matter what, but there he was instead of rediscovering himself out side of the court he was ruining himself for someone who never cared, how embarrassing was that, to stope so low to a point where he falls victim of this shitty thing called love.
He didn't love Kageyama like a soul mate more of a brother a close one with an unbreakable bond, but he did love someone else, the option was off the table anyways, he couldn't even give a shit about his emotions.
But now his stuck with the headline.
"Japanese sensation Raiden Natsuo is unable to play volleyball for the next year according to his couch"
That was shitty on his part.
"Raiden stop being reckless, your falling apart and you know it, it's affecting your play. Try to fall in love get a real life then come back. Do something heal yourself, I don't want to see you like this your a kid get some closure. I know your past was hard and you feel unable especially with the disease but you can do this, you can get some closure and understand life as it and come back relaxed and calm and ready to take your place as our wing spiker, we need you. "
If it was his couch then he would do it, no volleyball means he had to find something else to do, maybe manage the team or just drop by a few times and talk but he just felt incomplete and all he could do was sigh.
What hurt the most was the crying, the voices and everything it was unbearable, he felt vulnerable for once.
Disease, he hated that word but he couldn't help it, a chronicle heart disease, it wasn't bad I mean he was going to get surgery in two months, how was he going to tell Kageyama or him. He didn't know maybe they wouldn't care.
His life was starting to get complicated.
Usually his escape was cutting but he looked at his arm and felt embarrassed, what would he say if he found out. Would he hate him?
He took his pocket knife, it was sharp very sharp and he didn't even hesitate one slice turned into two and now they were uncountable and worse of all he was disgusted.
All the blood that had dripped was intense, he staggered to his bathroom washing it up and pouring a large amount of stinging spirit and soon he was wrapped up in bandages.
He was killing himself and he needed to stop, all this madness was getting out of hand something was wrong and he needed to fight hard enough to find it.
"Raiden... Why are you bandaged.."
His breathing hitched as he stared at his friend that seemed to be in deep thought, this wasn't how it was supposed to be no, not like this.
It was supposed to be in a tranquil environment with cherry blossoms and fucking flowers, pardon the French.
"I'm quitting volley ball, I'm sorry."
