Soulseer ✔️ *COMPLETE*

Chapter Twenty-Three

Sleep eludes me, my brain too full of questions to slow down. Knowing more about being a Weaver has led me to wonder which is worse: if I'm not the Weaver? Or if I am? If I'm not the Weaver, the world is primed for another episode like the one that preceded the Great Burning - this new so-called Dark Weaver is unchallenged in his abilities.

But if I actually am the Weaver, will I have to yoke my friends? My teachers? Sorren? I don't want to do that. They'll hate me. I'll hate me.

There has to be more to being a Weaver. Weavers made Gatherings. Did people have to be yoked and forced to help create them? And how do you even yoke someone-with or without consent? Also, why is it called Weaving? Because you Weave Inbetween to create something? Or because you Weave a connection with another Seer? Or maybe - you Weave Inbetween to create a connection with another Seer? So many questions.

It's all semantics because I don't know how to do any of those things and the one person who might be able to show me will apparently view me as his sole opposition.

That's when the worst thought of all pops into my sleep-deprived brain. What if he won't view me as his enemy - but as an ally he just needs to yoke?

At least now I have some small hope: there is a chance, however remote, that Adamu or his friends in the other Gathering, Six Seas, may find something helpful, anything that sheds more light on the nature of being a Weaver. I cling to that thought like a spar of driftwood in an otherwise empty ocean.

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"Hammer!" Ximena yells as I finish wiping the majority of the sand from my face and body. I look up and realize that Seer Sahar must have ended the lesson. I guess I didn't hear her over the ringing in my ears.

I limp over to the arena entrance where Ximena and Mohsin wait for me. After three more days of being pummelled in an astonishing array of methods, I'm no closer to a sudden manifestation of Weaver abilities.

My eyes drift up to survey the large, sand-filled circle, surrounded by several rows of seats like a Gladiator arena. There's probably also a similar amount of blood, sweat and tears embedded in the sands. Mostly mine lately. But for a change, there's no one watching.

I'm not sure how much more I can take. I'm exhausted all the time. And the great hope evinced by everyone is starting to wane in the face of my continual failure to manifest any great ability. I wake up with the panic of being a catastrophic washout every morning. And every night the fear of "success" claws at me, pulling me down into a dark hole. But there have been no attacks. Every hour that passes without invasion is a gift.

"What's the next class?" I ask, falling into step between Ximena and Mohsin. It's all a blur of bruises to me, physical and mental.

Mohsin and Ximena share a look. Then Mohsin grabs my shoulder. He peers into my eyes, his soul pulled up like a kite above us.

"Should we take her to Seer Willow?" Ximena asks.

Why would I need to see the doctor?

I dab at my face where the sand burn stings worst. "Am I bleeding again?" But there's no blood on my hand. A rush of calm and clarity comes over me. Mohsin is radiating it now. It's almost certainly his primary Talent. It's what makes Maia so formidable and is a brilliant, some would say essential Gift for leaders to have. So far, Mohsin hasn't manifested much in the Alpha department, to his aunt's chagrin, but Emoting has hundreds of applications, particularly as Inspiration. And that's not even getting into the darker side of the Gift - Expiring. Not only can you send feelings at someone, you can also take feelings from someone. That's good if they're bad feelings but less good if you're draining them of hope or ambition. Even though it's not as visually striking as say... Shaping, it's perhaps an even more powerful ability - especially if you become able to scale it beyond one person, the way that Maia does, manipulating a whole crowd at once. For now, Mohsin's efforts clear my head a bit. Enough for me to remember what we were talking about before Sahar's session.