Always [N.H]

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Niall and Arden had been together for over five years, Niall only having found out about Arden's disorder one year into their relationship. Anyway, despite this, the past five years with her had been relatively blissful, they had their ups and downs but they were happy. At least Niall was happy and he always strived to make sure Arden was as happy as he could help her be. And even when she was anything but joyous, for his sake, Arden pretended to be, it was difficult, often she had to skip out on concerts or performances because she didn't want him to get distracted by her the constant checking on her well-being but if it helped Niall focus on his career, she didn't mind.  However there were moments, times when Niall was at a loss, where her episodes were so bad, causing her to act out and act irrationally, when she was no longer able to pretend and  he couldn't even recognize her anymore.

They usually came when she had sudden fits of rage, when, no matter how much she tried, she was incapable of preventing herself from shouting, reacting angrily to everything she touched. Niall would have his hands up, carefully trying to soothe her as if she was some wild animal that needed to be tamed. And she hated it, she hated it so much that that was the way Niall saw her, that he had this constant need to be careful around her.

Other times were when she was at an all time low, when she hid herself in the darkness of her room, all curtains closed, shrouded under the thickness of the bed's duvet, Niall just standing by hopelessly, wondering how he could help. He never really could and they usually ended up waiting until the episode had passed by itself because there was nothing else they could do, her medications nor her weekly therapy sessions could do much or anything at all to ease her pain. But she always managed to work her way through it.  

It happened two years ago, the day Niall and Arden had reached the lowest point in their relationship,. They had just bought the apartment and apart from that, another thing Niall did with his first paycheck was gift his brother and his wife a night at England's fanciest hotel and Spa, they had supported him unconditionally on his journey to becoming a musician and he felt that this was a way of saying thank you. They left their son, Niall's nephew, Theo with Arden and Niall for the night and the toddler was ecstatic, loving his uncle more than anything in the world. 

They had been playing outside on the balcony, Theo playing race cars with his uncle. 

"What do you want to do for dinner?" Arden, who had been sitting aside watching them, asked, enjoying the sun on her skin. She was in a happier mood and Niall couldn't help but enjoy the sight for a second. 

"I don't know, how about some takeout? Pizza?" He suggested and Theo's lit up at the mention of his favourite food.

"Yes! Pizza!" He squealed and both Arden and Niall cooed at his cuteness.

"I'll go out and get some, I'll be right back." Niall ruffled Theo's hair and planted a soft kiss on Arden's lips before leaving. Arden watched Theo play for a bit, eyes closing for a short nap but not even ten minutes later her eyes shot open again, the familiar feeling of drowning occupying her mind. She felt heavy and she needed to breath, she left the balcony to the kitchen, grabbing a large glass of water and her medication but it didn't really help. She ended up on the living room couch, tears trickling down her face, sad about God knows what, honestly just trying to stay afloat but like always it was hard.

"Arden? Baby? What's wrong?" Niall kicked the front door close, putting the pizza boxes away before approaching her, crouching down to wipe Arden's tears away. "Hey, it'll be alright. Have you taken your medication?" Arden nodded and Niall smiled reassuringly, however his smile faltered slightly as he looked around. 

"Where's Theo?" He asked and Arden looked at him, mind in too much of a haze to comprehend what he was saying. "Arden, where's Theo?" He asked urgently but when he still didn't get a reply he couldn't help but hold on to both her arms sternly.