Mcyt oneshots

Wish it were me - dreamnap

// suicide

Angst

Sapnap's POV

It's depressing seeing your two best friends fall in love. And I know it sounds selfish, feeling like you should be happy for the two, but all you feel is pity.

Sometimes it could be overwhelming seeing how I never stood a chance.

I was the also in love with Dream but seeing the way he looked at George. It made me realize he'd never love me in the way he loved him..

But I couldn't blame him, George was the definition of perfect in many peoples eyes.

A brunette with chocolate brown eyes and freckles with an amazing personality, I couldn't be upset at Dream for being in love with him.

But it still didn't make this rejection any better.

And I alway felt horrible, having to pretend I was happy for them.

Knowing the two are deeply in love, and wanting him, knowing it'll never happen.

I always see all these couples so happy with one another. And of course I want something like it, but it feels like a punch to the stomach, knowing I will never get it.

Knowing that your one true love doesn't feel the same way.

And sometimes I feel as thought I should hate George, but I can't, he's an angel in everyone's eyes. I want to hate him for taking Dream from me but it feels impossible.

I wish that I was as perfect as George was.

And I see how Dream always laughs at his jokes, with his arm over George's shoulder.

I would do anything in hope that it would be me Dream would have his arm around.

He was so perfect, dirty blonde hair and emerald green eyes. Tanned skin with the most beautiful freckles spotted all over his face.

If anyone deserves him, it would be George.

Dream was always sweet to me, but never in the way that he was in love with me.

The small things he would do to be an amazing friend would mean the world to me, but like always, it would be crushed knowing that how I felt would never be returned.

Wether it was him letting me borrow a hoodie or saying the nicest things.

It would always feel good until I'd remember he couldn't feel the same way I did.

As I see them walk around, giggling at one another, holding hands. It makes me realize I should feel happy for the two.

"Do you love me Dream?" I found myself asking him

"What? Of course I do, you're my best friend."

"No, I mean as more than friends.."

"Sapnap- you know I love George"

"I- I know, and I know you aren't in love with me. I understand why, George is perfect he's the one who deserves you."

"I'm sorry Sapnap, I can't let go of George."

"I get it, you love him, I know I could never be as amazing as him. I know I don't deserve you. But I can never forget that night we shared a kiss. It may have been during our high school days but I can't let it go."

"That kiss was a mistake, we were stupid teenagers back then. It didn't mean anything."

"A mistake huh?"

I wish it were me, I wish I was the person he loved.

I deserve this rejection don't I? I was stupid enough to think there was slight hope for once.

I couldn't compare to George, what the hell was I thinking saying that.

just like that, I probably fucked everything up.

And I'm tired of crying myself to sleep every night because of this.

Im tired of staying in bed all day because of the stupid mistakes. But I can't just change the fact that I like him.

That's the thing about love that drives you crazy. When you try so hard to move on but just can't.

It feels like I need to let go of this stupid crush, but I just can't.

And it might sound weird but this love that I have towards him is making me crazy.

It's driving me out of my mind seeing them happy with one another.

They probably wouldn't notice if I was gone.

Right?

Well I guess we'll have to wait and see huh?

I just wish it were me...

---

"You in there?"
"Sapnap?"
"Hey sap?"
"I'm coming in Sapnap."

"Sapnap?" Dream said straining his voice as he found him lying on the bathroom floor.

"SAPNAP?"

Dream began to shake him, hoping he would wake up.

"GEORGE!"
"GEORGE!"

"What?"
"What the hell is goin-"

"CALL THE AMBULANCE GEORGE!"
"CALL A FUCKING AMBULANCE!"

Both of them were sat on the floor with tears rolling down onto the marble floor.

George was on the phone explaining the best he could to the operators.

But it was too late, he was pronounced dead on the scene.

Both the boys were sat crying as they held each other tight.

"It's all my fault.." (D)

"W-what?" (G)

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(Wc - 832)

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