What if he's just in my head

Am sorry

Oh guys guess who came here with a boyfriend today...I heard Sydney shout the moment I approached them in the beach...yea they decided we should all meet in the beach to chill out while they make fun of me am sure. Why am I even here? I asked myself...I looked up and realised almost the whole of my class are present!
Today is gonna be a huge shit for you Rose a voice I guess came from my inside said,yea I have to admit it today is a turn off. I just couldn't turn back as I was determined to face my fears this time you won't face your fears instead your fears would face you idiot that same voice said
Ughhh I got to ignore that shit taking inside of me.
Hi guys I said half smiling half crying inside
Where's your boyfriend Rose? Sydney has been telling us about him all this while Bella the youngest in the group said.
Hey yo sis I heard he lives in the states Emma added.
See I told you today is gonna go all wrong for you guess someone started by making it bad already the voice inside my head said laughing. Guys...my boyfriend couldn't make it here you know...he he he is busy yea he he says he has a meeting yes at the hills in the north I said stammering. I really suck at lying I know right.
Really? You have a boyfriend? I doubt it tho...you? Rose Sleeve having a boyfriend? Cut out the joke dummy am in no mood for this. I only told them you had one so you would try to lie and cover up the fact that you never had a bf since you were born probably...Sydney continued ranting at her loudest so everyone could hear. She really us right I thought but since I was born?
Oh yea I never did had a boyfriend just having series of crush per year with no true worth and now am 16. Sydney has to learn how to stop hurting me with her words...she does that every moment we meet like what the fuck she was my bestie before she joined the cheer leaders group.
Your best friend? Or your jealous friend. You need to wise up you have only me. Am your only friend. I'd always be there for you you know .That weird voice said. I really need to stop this voice of a thing in my head.
Hey Rose heyyy Nath shouted zooming me out of my thoughts.
Yes yes am listening I said.
So Emma told you to video call your boyfriend in that way we all can see him Nath said with a smirk.
Video call?why would I call someone who does not exist. I think I have to stop the lies now
Video call?...to be honest guys I have no boyfriend yet I....
See I told you all she's a fucking loser! You have it all and you find it so hard to please a guy what a shame! Sydney said interrupting me
She doesn't have a boyfriend at 16?I had my first at 12 babe and you are way finer than me is it that you can't keep a guy or you are scared of relationships? A girl I didn't know was part of my class spoke
She can't be scared you know who knows maybe she is the one chasing them all away. Am disappointed in your beauty tho Emma said making each word echo. It hurts when you are the topic of discussion
Why not get yourself a teddy or be a nun I think you would do well. Being in a cheerleaders group without a boyfriend really?a huge shame I might say Betty said whilst kissing Nath
Are those guys a thing?
How is that your concern when you won't be a thing with me? That stupid voice said
Cat got your tongue or you just gonna stand there staring?Sydney added
I turned to leave as I was emotionally down already. I need a place to pour out myself. I walked away ignoring the various remarks coming from them but of all I still managed to hear Mark who said you got a nice ass mind coming over to my place later in the day?who knows if we can make it work. It took everything inside of me not to go back and slap the guy.

I ran out of the place and by mistake or should I say by clumsiness I ran into a guy.
Oh my am so sorry....

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