NEVER BROKEN: A SailorMoon Fanfiction

Fears

It took Serena two months to form the question to Darien. It had been bugging her since that tete-a-tete with Rei. Warmly cocooned in his embrace after being made love to, she felt enough courage inside for the words to escape her lips.

"Darien?"

"Hmm?"

She could tell that he was half-asleep. She turned around and was now facing his wide chest, her head directly under his chin.

"Did you marry me because your grandfather asked you to?"

"Yes," he clearly stated.

Tears pricked her eyes. So what Rei said was true. He did marry her because he needed to. Dad must have been trying to tell me that...

"Where are you going?" he asked when he felt her move.

Her throat felt too constricted, but she managed to let out the words. "T-to the bathroom. Go to sleep."

Upon reaching the confines of their magnificent bath, she turned on the tap in full and wept. Oh, how she wept.

He was leaving for a one-week overseas business trip the following day. Serena was thankful that she didn't need to see him off the airport. He would have noticed her puffy eyes and that was the last thing she wanted.

She was barely aware how she lasted the week without him, and the usual work to occupy her. Lita noticed her frequent visits to the store but Serena neither confirmed nor allayed her friend's suspicions. She had agreed to Darien's suggestion that she resign from her job at Lita's weeks after they have come back from their honeymoon.

Now, she suddenly wanted to have her job back. But she didn't want to arouse Lita's concern. It was kind enough of her friend not to pry. At any cost, she could not afford to make Darien look bad in the eyes of her friend, or anyone else for that matter.

He didn't promise anything. She assumed everything right from the start.

Her insecurity was her own fault.

Memories

She had been married to Darien for five months when her sister-in-law called up to invite her out for lunch.

"Is Miss Farley coming with you?" Serena tried to sound like it would not make a difference.

"Didn't Darien tell you?" Ami countered.

"Told me what?"

"She accompanied him in this business trip."

Serena suddenly felt dizzy at the knowledge.

"Reena?"

"Y-yes, he did. Sorry, I forgot. So it's just gonna be the two of us, then."

He had been gone for three days. And Rei Farley was with him. Even a wife without an imagination would develop one. Why did he have to keep it a secret if it was purely business?

She looked up to find her husband eyeing her oddly.

"How long have you been standing there?" she asked.

"Glad you finally noticed," he answered sarcastically from the doorway.

He was tired, she reasoned out. She saw him walk to the bed, placing his suitcases atop it.

"Would you like me to prepare—"

"I'm not hungry."

She stood up, thinking of getting out of the room, give him space while he changed clothes.

"What is the matter, Ren?" he grated as she was nearing the door, her back to him. "Suddenly feeling shy?"

"I... I don't know what you're talking about," she returned.

"No, you don't, do you? You've been giving me the cold shoulder for weeks now."

She turned to face him and saw the glittering contempt in his blue eyes. They seemed darker, devoid of tenderness.

"Why didn't you tell me that Rei was with you?"

"That's your excuse? Why not be honest and admit that you're finding this marriage a bore?"

"And whose fault is that? I'm not the one who's working all the time." He was being cruel, and she wanted to hurt back. "And with your perfect secretary!"

"So you're tired of living with me. Found someone else to be with?"

How could he accuse her of such a thing?

"I didn't say that!"

"No, you implied it," he retorted.

"Maybe it is you who suddenly found your secretary more satisfactory than your wife."

"Don't bring your childish jealousy into this."

"Don't make excuses if you want out. I'd never hold you to this relationship against your will." Her heart was beating painfully in her ribcage. The thought of setting him free was killing her softly.

"How magnanimous of you!"

She felt like crying. The reason why he married her remained—and that was the only thing that tied them to each other. Business.

Serena wished she had the courage to say that she now knew why he married her, why he had to. She had talked to James, and her father admitted the agreement between their families.

Until this moment she believed that Darien stayed with her because he had feelings for her—something akin to affection, if not love in its entirety. But the harsh manner by which he was speaking to her now belied all that she held dear to her heart—and everything that was telling her to stay and fight for her love.

She needed to be sure of one thing.

"I should never have agreed to marry you." The lie tore her apart inside.

She saw him pale. In anger, she was certain.

"I shouldn't have asked you to."

That was the final straw. So it was not her he was thinking of, speaking to while making love to her that night.

"I'd still marry you..." he had said at least twice while drowning her in his fevered passion.

How could she even think that he was referring to her? They were already married.

It could only mean one thing. He was thinking of that woman while making love to her—his wife. That was his promise to Rei. And being the man that he was, Serena knew that Darien would keep it.

She didn't want to leave him. She needed to.

They slept in separate beds after that night. Serena could not even bring herself to apologise for all the bitter things she had said, or thank him for his generosity. Their ensuing conversations were reduced from snappy and spiteful comments to cold politeness—indifference, and finally to unbearable silence.

Serena was certain that she had lost forever whatever Darien had felt for her in the past. It would never find her again.