Maniac || Choi Beomgyu

Chp.5-Love and Hate

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After three whole weeks of no contact there she was right beneath me, breathless.

Her flushed cheeks and messy hair was mesmerizing. I knew I should've stopped but I just couldn't.

One kiss led to another the next thing I knew I had carried her to our bedroom, placed her on the bed.

And kissed her again.
And kissed down her neck,biting it softly.

I kissed every inch of her... and made love to her.

We both now lay there staring at each other not knowing what to say. I got off her now laying on my back next to her.

"We shouldn't have done it" She says her voice echoing in the silence.

I scoff  "Not like we haven't before".

She doesn't say anything.

It's true... she was my first and I was hers, it happened after graduation, we went out to celebrate just the two of us. No friends, no alcohol, no drugs, just each other's company.

We went to our secret place, it was an open area hidden behind a wall of vines in the forest near our house, we found it while exploring the forest one day.

The place was already special because only we knew about it but after that night it became even more special.

We were laying on the grass under a star filled sky. That same night she told me she loved me and I told her I loved her. To me that night was filled with what I think was love and I hope that it was because it felt magical to me.

I remember that night clearly, how she felt beneath me, how soft her skin was and how beautiful her voice sounded saying my name.

We were both nervous of course but that night I felt like I had seen a side of her no one else had like I was seeing the real her.

Was it just my imagination?.

I get pulled out of my flashback when I feel the bed move I see her sit up her bare back facing me.

She picks up her clothes from the floor and starts putting them back on.

I sit up as well exposing my chest "you're leaving?" I ask not expecting an answer since it's obvious.

"It's like 02:00am... and after what we just did you're just going to walk out?!" I raise my voice slightly trying to get her to respond.

She stops her hand on the door knob, she turns to me "yes... it was a mistake we were both drunk anyway".

She sighed "Look I'm sorry...I shouldn't of called you in the first place"

With that she walks out I hear the front door close and I'm left in the silence now that she's gone back to where ever it is that she's staying for the time being.

I grip the bed sheets tightly between my fists I feel my anger bubbling to the surface, grabbing the nearest thing to me, that being the lamp on the bedside table I throw it and watch as it crashes and breaks against the door.

I throw myself back on the bed running my hands through my hair in frustration.

'She used me...'

I decided to try and get some rest staying up and thinking won't do me any good anyway.

~

When I woke up it was around 03:15pm I had slept through the morning at least I'll be working a night shift today at the bar so I'll be well rested for that.