A spring without you | soukoku

Spring

"Fatal familial insomnia: an extremely rare autosomal disease of the brain." Dazai's eyes trailed down the bright screen of his laptop. "FFI has no known cure and involved progressively worsening insomnia which leads to hallucinations, delirium, confusional states like that of dementia, and eventually, death. Average survival time for patients after onset of symptoms is 18 months."

Dazai reread the same sentence over and over again. "FFI has no known cure."

Numbness crept into his system as he blankly stared at the sentence. No cure. Chuuya's condition had no cure. Realization dawned upon him as he slid down his seat. Chuuya was going to die, and he couldn't do anything about it.

Dazai slammed his laptop shut. He refused to accept this. Even if there was no cure now, he could hope that one would eventually be found. Clinging onto the small glimmer of hope, the brunet prepared to leave for work. There was no way he was going to merely accept this.

***

Akutagawa walked into Chuuya's office only to find the executive agitatedly pacing around.

"Nakahara-san?"

Chuuya whipped his head towards the intruding voice.

"What."

The irritation in the redhead's voice caused the younger member to slightly step back. Sapphire eyes flickered towards his face.

Chuuya sighed. "It's just you Akutagawa." He straightened out. "What is it?"

The cloaked mafia coughed several times before responding.

"The boss wanted to know where the reports where. Said it's unlike you to be late with them when you're normally so punctually-"

Chuuya's frustrated voice cut him off.

"Shit. That's what I forgot."

The executive pinched the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes tightly.

"I'll  get it right now."

Proceeding to the door, Akutagawa nodded in acknowledgement but turned back around.

"Nakahara-san is something wrong? You've been forgetting many things recently." Black eyes stared at his head. "Including your hat."

Chuuya cursed under his breath. He couldn't believe he had forgotten his beloved hat or that even Akutagawa, someone who was only interested in Dazai's attention, had noticed his forgetfulness.

"It's nothing," he responded.

Akutagawa stared at him a second longer than he normally would before exiting the room.

Chuuya sighed once he was alone. The heaviness of his bones felt as the weight of the world was upon his shoulders, and he swayed slightly as he fumbled around his desk looking for the unfinished reports. The redhead brought a hand to his eyes and wondered if Mori would give him the rest of the day off. Chuuya grunted. It was worth a shot.

***

His days were relatively quiet, and Chuuya found the silence welcoming in his exhausted state but also somewhat lonely. His insomnia had progressively gotten worse as he found himself restlessly turning in bed only to blankly stare at the ceiling till the sun rose.

Not even drinking helped ease some of his fatigue. In fact, being drunk only reminded him more of his physically worn out state as he wasn't able to sleep off the alcohol.

Chuuya sat down on the couch and stared at the quiet city outside his window. The city slept as it should, leaving Chuuya alone in the darkness. He debated moving to do something semi-productive when a sudden knock on his door drew his attention.