♡THERAPY♡

**I'm not happy**

      I'm sprawled on my floor and just thinking about how horrible my day has been. I don't know where to start from though, should I start from where I got late to school only for me to enter the class and my classmates were about to write test which is like 30% of my grade? Or from where I saw the test questions and I was super happy cause they were the area's I covered last week but the time was not enough for me to answer them? Or from where I realized that the lecturer may record the test? Or from where I ordered this really cute dress online in  color black and only for me to get it in color brown or something? Or from where I realized my birthday is tomorrow and I couldn't pray for anything more than for this week to just pass by and take its misery with it?

Yh! A super horrible day indeed!
And I'm tired!
I'm tired of taking all the shit life throws!
I'm tired of the fake smiles I put up so people won't ask me what's wrong with me!
I'm sooo frustrated and today I let that frustration out!
Although I was super conscious of how scrunched up my face was but I just couldn't hold back!
I am stressed, doubtful of tomorrow (I've stopped looking forward to my birthdays ) and I'm just so pessimistic right now which is unlike me.
I feel like I've lost so many connections with people because I've been trying to cope with a lot. I'm in a school I didn't plan for, dealing with stress that was underated, I can't feel my limbs, I can't feel anything! And I can't keep my friendships.

I don't care about a lot of people but the ones I care about, I really do care for them and even when they go and leave whenever they like, I still care because we once shared memories–unforgettabe memories and I can't erase that. Nothing can erase that and they were once there for me. They've once saved me without even knowing and it's not like I'm indebted to them but I want to save them to when they need it. So when I forget these people (which I do a lot) ,it hurts me.

I'm honestly not the best at communication and I don't check up on people but I still like to be there for them the little way I can and even that little way has been destroyed by myself. (Sad right?)

Anyways, I'mma get over this negativity I'm feeling today because IT'S NOT FOR ME AND IT DOESN'T BELONG THERE!

And I do hope and pray good things come my way and your way foreverrrr.

P.s I just discovered that I have ADHD and having ADHD doesn't mean you have to be Hyperactive. You can also be normal but you'll be extra forgetful, you'll daydream a lot, you'll lose focus a lot like someone can be talking to you but you ain't hearing them! It's actually really tiring and embarrassing. I forget even the littlest things to the extent that I forget what happens in the morning sometimes and when people are talking to me and I keep telling them to repeat themselves makes me look dumb😣
But I'll get over it and overcome it.

Enough of me, how are you today?
How did your day go?

Do you have any disorder you're suffering from too?

How do you cope with your disorder?
Hope you've eaten cause I'm just having my breakfast at 5:28pm (lol)

Do share your experience in the comment section.

Until next time my pretties 🚶