It was the 18th of August, as the last petal fell on the cherry blossom tree I carved our initials on. H + I, perfectly matched and herded together by a perfect heart. I remember that day well, Itachi had taken me on our first date, a picnic by the beautiful lake in the Shinjuku garden, Tokyo. After waving my porcelain finger in the crisp, fresh water, I knelt down on the pink checkered blanket he laid out. With the sharp edge of the cap of some strawberry Ramune, I carved the heart, with the special H + I for Hanako and Itachi.
I loved him with my whole heart, my whole body. He was so special, so beautiful, mother natures finest creation. On warm summer nights he would take me to the beach, we would lay in the sand for hours talking about things as useless as our favorite chocolates, or as deep and metaphorical as life, as he played with my silky golden hair. Some days, he would take me to his mothers rose garden, and sit with me underneath the fleur de lis gazeebo, with a glass of bittersweet champagne. I would stare deep into is eyes, as he stared in mine. He was a truly magical creature, everything about him was perfect, almost too perfect - but I didn't mind. He was mine and I was his, and I could not be happier.
I walked under the sweet sakuras, an elegant Kimono gliding behind me. The pebble path introduced me to the happiest day of my life. I walked down, being illuminated by lanterns winded through beautiful blossom trees. Showers of thin paper shapes cascading above me, each one fluttering down like the wing of a butterfly. I tucked a loose piece of hair as I looked up; that was when I saw him. Dressed in a Black kimono stood Itachi. Tears welled in my eyes, I was soon to be the bride of the love of my life, the man who made me feel complete, the man who I was utterly devoted to.
"This woman, I marry; no matter what the health situation is-"
A smile larger than the moon plastered my face as a simple tear rolled down. I had dreamed of this day ever since I was little, it was finally here. I had not a single regret, no second thoughts, just pure, innocent happiness and unconditional love.
Itachi breathed heavily before the next line left his lips.
"I.. do not love this person."
What? What did he say? He does not love me? My smile dropped as a lantern began to flicker away.
"I'm so sorry Hanako.. I wanted to make you happy, I really did. I had to wait until now, I couldn't bear to break your heart sooner. It's true I do care for you, there was I time when I did truly love you, it's just.."
I couldn't hear anything. I refused to hear anything. Before allowing him to finish, I ran. I didn't know where or how far, I just ran. I loved him so much, he was my everything, I depended on that man. How could he just have lied the whole time? Snot and tears began to cover my face, I looked a wreck. I couldn't let anybody see me in this state, especially not my poor mother. After what felt like hours, I found a small rock and simply fell onto it. My body was weak and confused, I was completely broken inside and out. I cried and cried for ours on end, even a cough made it's way into the chaotic mixture. A cough? Why a cough? I looked down, beneath my mouth, and that's where I saw it. A small splatter of blood and.. A rose petal? I didn't see any roses around, I was so confused. I ran home in a desperate need of explanation. I began coughing more and more as more rose petals escaped my mouth.
Hanahaki - A disease where the victim of unrequited or one-sided love begins to vomit or cough up the petals and flowers of a flowering plant growing in their lungs, which will eventually grow large enough to render breathing impossible if left untreated. There is no set time for how long this disease lasts but it may last from 2 weeks to 3 months, in rare cases up to 18 months, until the victim dies unless the feelings are returned or the plants are surgically removed.
Pure fear flooded my entire body. I was going to die. I had always told myself I'd die without him, however I never expected literally. I didnt want to die, I wanted to marry, have children, live. Surgery was impossible, and how was I to make him love me, and how was I to ensure that love was pure? I couldn't die like this, I was 17, I was still young. More and more rose petals found their way outside of my body, as my lungs filled with thorns and blossoms. I screamed in agony; this was all his fault. Why was I so hard to love? I was pretty, respectable, polite, smart, rich, the list goes on. I was perfect, so why not me? Was I to die alone? A solitary tear cascaded down my white-washed face, leaving a line of my natural pigment. Natural.. how could I be so idiotic. Love is natural, along with death. Perhaps I would reincarnate and fall in love with him in another life? Or become a porcelain butterfly, another victim to the earths decay. Perhaps this was a sign, I had taken advantage of the earth I was given, and therefore it took advantage of me. We built our machines and houses on mothers land, so mother had to move to my lungs. Oh, how it hurt, I was in utter agony. I wanted to live so desperately, but I was also ready to let go. My body weakened, rotting, decaying.
The flowers would not stop, neither would the thorns inside of me. With a final stretch, my lungs were torn open, piercing my heart with it. I collapsed, alone, nobody to keep my name alive.
Here lies; Hanako Akane.
Always the bridesmaid, but never the bride.
2000 - 2017
{NOTE:- Hanako Akane is named that for a reason! Hanako translates to Flower Girl, and Akane translates to deep red, foreshadowing the roses and the disease as a whole. The name Itachi means weasel, to foreshadow his lie about loving her. In the Hanahaki Disease, the flower the victim coughs up is one very special to them. Hanako coughed up roses because of Itachis mothers rose garden.}
