What if? (Phan)

I

"Surprise, Dan!" I called, running into his room. He looked up at me from the bed and smiled weakly at the new camera I had bought him. "Oh, Phil - you really shouldn't have."

"Only the best for you," I grinned, sitting next to him and kissing him softly on the cheek. He turned and grabbed me, pulling me into a bear hug. A muffled sob broke from his mouth. I hugged him back tightly, holding his head against my chest. "What's wrong, baby?"

"I can't do this anymore. I'm tired of being judged by my parents, of hiding who we really are, of being criticised all the time. I just don't see the point anymore."

"Don't think like that," I soothed. "I love you and your parents just don't understand the concept of gay marriage. That's not your fault and soon they will accept it. And if you want to tell the fans, we will tell them, ok?"

"Ok," he sniffed.

"And as for the criticism, anyone who can't see that you're perfect has something wrong with them. You are my world and I will never let anyone hurt you."

"You can't promise that."

I frowned. "Who's hurting you?"

"Nobody, I just-"

"Dan, you said you'd stopped!" I grabbed his hand and pulled up his sleeve. "You said you didn't do it any more."

"Yeah, well I did. I stopped, and then-"

"Oh, Dan, please just talk to me. You know how much it hurts me to see you do this to yourself." He buried his face deeper into my chest. "I - I will. I'm sorry."

I closed my eyes and let my tears fall into his perfect brown hair. "Please look for help first." He sniffed and nodded. "Phil?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

"Oh, baby, I love you too."