and they were roommates! (oh my god they were roommates!)

an 8 legged encounter!

It's pretty late here at hotel Oj. Me and Cheesy are both in our shared room and it's pretty peaceful...
until Cheesy picks me up by the hips and hoists me over his head.
This fucking idiot.
"ILL PUMMEL YOU CHEESY! PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!"
"I JUST NEED YOU FOR A BIT TROPHY! IT'LL ONLY TAKE A SECOND!"
"IT BETTER!"
he bangs my head on the wall above of his bed.
"OW!"
"got it! 8 legs can't beat two am I right?"
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"
"There was a spider on the wall! It's in your cup now, wait, don't move." He sets me down and I have to tilt my head and stand on his bed in order to keep myself on the wall.
I can't believe this. I'm not afraid of a measley spider but still, we have plenty of NON SENTIENT cups just lying around! I don't understand why he had to use me! I'll kill him when he gets here I swear-
He comes back with paper hoisted over his head.
Sigh. Maybe I shouldn't murder Cheesy in cold blood when Paper is here. I grumble.
"H-hey what's the big idea Cheesy?"
"I just need you two for a second I promise! I know it isn't an arachno-TON of fun at the moment being used like this Paper, but it'll all be worth it!"
He slides Paper in the middle of the wall and my cup and slowly moves him on top of me so that I'm standing straight up and not tilting my head anymore. this is pretty fucking weird. Cheesy is a weirdo.
"Okay paper, just lay like that while I carry trophy outside-
"I CAN WALK MYSELF YOU LITTLE TWERP!"
"anyways-
He completely ignores me and carries me outside with Paper.
Once we are outside he sets me down and starts to count down.
"Three, two, one, GO! He lifts paper off of me and the spider jumps out too, back into the wild where that creepy pest was supposed to be in the first place.
"Mission accomplished! I guess you could say that spider really bugged me!"
He knee slaps and I yawn.
"I gotta get to bed Cheesy-
"No problemo Trophy!"
He lifts me up, but bridal style this time.
"H-HEY! WHATS THE BIG IDEA?!?!?"
"Well, you're tired aren't you? I'm putting you to bed!"
"WHY YOU-
"oh um, see you later then Cheesy!"
"Thanks for all the help Paper, but I gotta put this hunk of grumpy gold to sleep!"
"Ah, I see where your priorities lie, I gotta get back to Oj too." He yawns. "Well, see you two lovebirds later! Hehe!"
"LOVEBIRDS!?!?!?"
Okay, maybe it IS okay to murder Cheesy, AND put Paper on my hit list too.
"WE AREN'T GAY!!!!"
"Hey! Who told you I wasn't gay? I'm happy all the time!" Cheesy smiles and I want to knock his teeth out.
But I also want to kiss his stupid, ugly, intolerable face.
I hate myself.