The Upside of Falling Back To You

chapter forty | red flags

THE DOORBELL rings. I roll off the couch and make my way to the front door. On the other side: Vi. It's late out, even if the sun isn't quite gone yet. But something tells me that it isn't good.

"Hey, everything alright?"

"Um... if I'm being honest, not really." Well, off the bat that didn't sound great. I invited her in and led her to the living room. She sat on the couch, I stood in front of her. She was nervous, her hand twitching, her legs squeezed together as if she was in danger.

"Is anyone else home?" Vi asked quietly.

I shook my head. "My dad's at work, Cas is at a friend's place for the night." I know Ronan is in Toronto at a Leafs game with the guys - unfortunate that he didn't decide to invite me, but Seb was handling the break up worse than Laila, so he needed some cheering up. Something had to be up at home. "Do you need me to call Ronan or someone else."

"No, no, I really just wanted to talk to you. I-" Vi pursed her lips. "You noticed something wrong when we spent Christmas together. I trust you, Asteria, you're like my older sister, you know."

I gave her a small smile. "Yeah, I know." But that made me worry a bit more. "Vi-"

"I should've... I knew I always had you to talk to but it was so weird... like, you and my brother weren't on good terms, Dad and Mom said maybe I should stay away from you in case Ronan didn't want me to talk to you. But I just - gosh, I'm so stupid, Asteria." There's tears in her eyes.

"Hey hey hey, you're not stupid." I sit next to her and hold her hand. "You can talk to me now, okay? What do you want to tell me?"

Vi sniffed and wiped her nose on the back of her sleeve. "You and Ronan always made me be so excited for high school, because I wanted to have a boyfriend and all that, you know? Like, obviously now I know it wasn't picture perfect but... I still wanted one. But, well, Dad suddenly got so possessive once I got to high school... it was really tough, you know, with Ronan being so famous and because of that everyone kinda knows me."

"Yeah, it can be a lot," I said. I pushed strands of her out of her eyes. "You probably had a lot of creeps come up to you."

She nodded. "Yeah... yeah, but I know how to handle myself, I could tell who's creepy and who I needed to stay away from... at least, I thought I did..." Her voice grew quiet as she said the last bit.

Vi's leg started fidgeting up and down. I squeezed her hand a little tighter, trying to calm her down.

"Dad didn't let me have a boyfriend. He made it really clear when I was going to grade nine." Vi coughed, then cleared her throat. "So, you know, obviously at one point I was going to go against his back... god, Asteria, I should've just listened to him-"

"Vi-"

"There was this party... like, last summer. I think Cas went - but anyways..." she couldn't look at me. "There were a bunch of college kids at the party and I accidentally... ended up... hooking up with one of them."

"I-" I was stuck, not sure what to say. "Was it a one time thing, or..."

Vi quickly shook her head. "It was exciting, you know? Older guy, really hot... and it kind of just felt right. I just wanted to date someone, have a high school romance, and I know, I know, he was in university but I just..." She closed her eyes. "I thought living under my parents' roof for sixteen years would've stopped me from ending up in a relationship like that... but at one point it kind of just felt suffocating to be with him..."

"And you didn't know how to leave?" I asked.

She nodded. "So, um, around Christmas, my friends... I don't know how I let them drift away, but they did. I didn't have anyone except... except him. And I was desperate for company, Asteria. So um- yeah, whenever I told my parents or Ronan I was out with friends, I was with him."

"Vi, did your friends know who you were with?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "I don't know... I don't know why I didn't tell them. But Asteria, that isn't exactly what I wanted to tell you... I..."

Violet stood up. She crossed her arms and rubbed her left one as she tried to find the words. "I missed my period last month. And this month. And I got paranoid because this never happened and I took a test and-"

I finished her sentence. "You're pregnant."

She burst into tears and came crashing into my arms. "I don't know what to do, Aster. I don't know who to talk to. I can't... I can't..."

"Shh... it's going to be okay. I'm here. I'm going to help you." I tried to calm her down, patting her back. "But first I'm going to ask you if it was an accident, or was it-"

"It was an accident," she said quickly, but something about her tone... something about the way she was shaking... I wasn't going to force the truth out of her if she didn't want to say it. "But I don't want to keep this baby, Aster. I can't keep it. I'm barely seventeen."

I sat her down again and got her a box of tissues. At the same time, I was trying to keep my own feelings at bay. I couldn't imagine what she was going through, and she decided I was the most trusted adult in her life to tell.

"You really don't want to tell your parents?" I asked her again. "Your mother, at least."

She shook her head. "I can't... I... I don't know what I would say. She'd be so disappointed in me, Aster."

"And Ronan...?"

Vi hesitated. And she doesn't even answer my question, but she asks another. "Why are your parents still close to mine? It's not a secret what my dad does to my Mom?"

I bit my lip. Again, I'm not really sure what to say. I really didn't know, and I don't know what was stopping them from intervening. "I guess... I guess that's the thing about really close friends, especially in older adults. They can't let go of their friends, even if they're shit people. My dad and your dad were really good friends, especially in university. And I guess... my parents want to be there for your mom, they don't want her to deal with it alone, so they tolerate your dad, too."

I don't think that was the best answer. I went back and remembered Christmas with the Easton's - even I was friendly towards Dalton, everyone was. The character he played was what we wanted to see as normal, even if it wasn't. He was getting better these past few years. I guess that added to everyone forgetting.

Vi pursed her lips. "Is it okay that I hate him?"

"Of course, I mean, your dad is a jerk-"

"Oh, um, I wasn't going to ask about him but-"

"That boyfriend of yours is a douche too, Vi. I think I-"

"I was going to ask about Ronan." Vi cuts me off. "Is it... is it okay if I hate him?" I stared at her, not quite sure to say, and I guess she got that. "I mean, I know Dad hurt him way worse, I know he needed to leave, but is it okay that I hate him for leaving me alone. Barely visited, left me with a father that, I will admit, didn't hurt me as bad as he hurt Ronan, but pretty much controlled my life instead?"

I drew in a breath before answering. "Yeah... yeah, I get that..." And I remember our conversation in the park in the dead of night. "You know, he wishes that he did something about your father. He feels really bad about leaving, but I know that isn't the same as staying."

Vi pursed her lips. "You can call him. But... can you tell him?"

I nodded. "Of course, kid. Sit tight, I'll be back."

I head upstairs, grab my phone and dial his number. He doesn't pick up the first time. I call him again. This time, he picks up. The noise level is insane, and I can't actually hear him.

"Aster, god this game is insane," Ronan yells through the phone. "I know you're upset you aren't here but do you need something, I kind of-"

"Busy, I could tell." Maybe I should wait until tomorrow. "But um, I need to tell you something about Vi, and I was really hoping I could tell you now. But if you want to-"

I could already hear the background noise grow softer. "I'm on my way."

☙

a/n so uh if you notice I'm uploading this at 12:30am EST it's because I'm going out with my family tmr and I don't think I'll open my laptop

things are happening :]