Dream smp incorrect quotes + reader

Compilation pt. 1

*wilbur and y/n sitting in jail*
Wilbur:so who should we call?
Y/n:I'd call Tommy, but I feel safer in jail-

Y/n:Wilbur...
Wilbur:oh no 'Wilbur' in B-flat.
Wilbur:you're disappointed

*y/n, tommy, and tubbo having dinner together*
Y/n:tubbo can you pass the salt?
Tubbo:*throws tommy across the table*

Y/n:please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste.
Wilbur:we got spring water
Y/n:NO
Technoblade:with EXTRA minerals
Wilbur:it's like licking a stalagmite
Y/n:DONT COME HOME
Technoblade:Mmmmmmm cave water.

Y/n: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?
Wilbur: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies
Tommy: Socks are Feetie Heaties
Technoblade: Forks are Stabby Grabbies
Wilbur: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties
Tommy: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies
Technoblade: Stamps are Lickie Stickies
Philza, annoyed: You are disappointments

Y/n: So uhhh... my question is: my friend keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked...
Technoblade: I would hope they're not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!
Tommy: In your pantry!
Y/n: Yeah... and eating them raw, and they keep calling them 'chips'. ... How do I make them stop?
Technoblade: Is your friend here?
Y/n, motioning to Wilbur: Yeah.
Technoblade, to Wilbur: You're a monster! Words MEAN things! >:(
Wilbur: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab em out of and chew-
Wilbur: HOLD ON. WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AS KIDS?!
Wilbur: NO, STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN
Everyone else: No.
Wilbur, to Technoblade and Tommy: YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS
Technoblade: YAAAAAAAAY!
Tommy: THE PRESTIGE!

Y/n: Good morning.
Wilbur: Good morning.
Philza: Good morning.
Technoblade: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.
Tommy: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS