Lover Is A Day

Chapter 5

It had been weeks since my first encounter with him, after that I did see him around sometimes. I took some time to observe him. Because I learnt a lot about him. He is a medical student, because I saw him wearing the coat, he always hangs arounds in groups. He also lost his glasses. And the biggest thing that I learned is his name. I hadn't gotten a chance to ask him name before when we had met. Back in Delhi, when we had gone to eat together, I had realized that I didn't knew his name, but I didn't ask because we had long interactions already, so it would had come off as awkward if I had asked. But I think I should have, because after he left, I thought about it a lot and had regretted.
Waking up in the morning feels relieving. Being on time has become my routine now. And I've come on good terms with rains. To find peace in storms, is to find rains calming. Hours pass slowly, but once the day is over, it all seems quick. I am always thinking about something, but I can't pinpoint exactly what. Everyday feels like an afternoon nap's dream. I can get used to this.

I sat alone in the canteen. Abhi and Mayur were caught bunking by the dean, So I was waiting for them. Canteen food wasn't bad, it saved me the effort to make mine own, so I ate whatever they provided. I took out my phone, to check dms, only to realize that most of them were useless.
'Hi, are you Raj?', a voice startled me
It was Shubham. He was standing next to me.
'Yes?'. Why did he ask for me, did he notice me stalking him? Is he going to ask me about it? 'What?', I asked, sounding as stern as I can
'Do you have some time?', he smiled
'Make it quick'. Was it too rude? So, I added 'please' too
'Okay' he said and quickly sat right next to me., without asking. 'I wanted to tell you that...'
It's happening, my heart beat so fast, but I didn't let it reflect on my face ofcourse. I tried to look as confident as possible.
'I wanted to tell you that... you see my friend over there, she likes you', he pointed to a table with two girls.
It was her. The girl who had been giving me the looks. She mischievously smiled at me, almost appearing sarcastic.
'She is my friend you see. By the way, have we met before? Cause I think I have seen you ...'
'The other day you had asked me to join your club, remember?'
'Oh right! The book club! Anyways her name is Zenna and we're in the same major', he said.
What should I do? Im used to strangers approaching me, but I never know how to react. Especially in situations like this. He was waiting for a response.
'I see', I said without thinking much. 'Im not interested in anyone'
'Why not?', he asked
'Well, I don't know her and...', I was trying to stay reasonable, but I think im coming off as rude. But I don't want to give them a wrong idea either, so I'll just be honest.
'And?'
'Nothing. It's a no'
'Don't be like this. Atleast talk to her, get to know her and then if you don't like her then reject her, okay?', he said 'Give me your number, I'll add you on socials'
'Sorry Shubham, Im not interested'
'Okay fine', he seemed dejected and stood up to leave, and then he stopped 'how did you know my name?'
Shit. He hadn't told me his name. I had known it because, I had heard one of his friends call him that.
'You told me last time... while asking me to join the club?', I tried to sound convincing
'I guess I did...', he looked confused, because he didn't.
'I will join the club', I blurted, to change the topic. Only seconds after saying that I realized the damage that I did.
So, we ended up exchanging numbers.

Books club is not an active club. There aren't many activities to do; we only talk about the books that we read and make lists, he told me and added me to the WhatsApp group. He is the vice president. I still think that I should join something else. Maybe I will join the basketball team with my friends. And now that I have told him, I will need to be in the books club too.
It was 6 in the evening. I sat on my dining table sipping coffee and it had stopped raining for some time. This is the time of the day when it is too dark to rely on daylight and too early to turn on the house light. After college I had come home ate lunch and studied, however today my mind was extremely disturbed, I can say that I spent most of my time zoning out, instead of studying.
Come to think of it, why am I being like this? It's not like I like him. But then why do I look out for him all the time? or why did my heart beat so fast when he talked to me? Why did I think soo much about him when he left Delhi? Or why am I thinking about him now?
In college, I hadn't gotten a chance to talk to him. It would had been awkward if I walked up to him and started talking, especially since my mind is such a mess., but somehow, I find comfort in this mess. I only feel gravitated towards him because I have a sense of familiarity with him and he only tried to set me up with his friend... yeah that's right. He didn't have any other intentions, how could he? He was only being friendly. We are both guys, it would make sense that his friends sent him to talk with me.
I have been in such a situation before, and it didn't end well. Why do I find myself in situations like these?
Either way, I stand no chance with him. I should find something else. And try not to think of it too much.