one shot collection

and i'll send you letters from miles away

sapnotfound

no warnings

"you're an idiot.."

those soft, strangely wholesome words, spoken with an airy giggle. sapnap can feel his heart start to flutter.

"you're an even bigger idiot."

it's like this most nights. silly insults thrown back and forth, dumb jokes about each other. but it's all love in disguise.

there's a cheeky smirk at first, then a big happy grin. sapnap knows just how gorgeous he is even when half his face is hidden behind bedsheets like this. his pearly whites, his smooth skin, that playful glint in his pretty brown eyes. he knows how beautiful his boyfriend is even when the facetime video quality is shit.

"i've missed you so much," he sighs, watching the brunet scoff at his confession.
"we talked yesterday sapnap."
"yeah, but yesterday was like, long as fuck ago?"

george shrugs, shuffling around in bed.

"i know what you mean," he mumbles, "i've missed you too. a lot."

sapnap smiles again. the only source of light in his bedroom is his phone screen, the thousands of little pixels that it's made up of. it makes it feel like it's just him and george, alone in the darkness together.

he doesn't need much more than that in his life; the feeling of being loved, the assurance that if he's ever down, consolation is just a quick phone call away. yet something vital is missing, something that only distance is keeping from him.

"do you ever think about what it's gonna be like when we meet irl?" he asks dreamily, "if you come down to texas?"
"of course i do," george responds, "all the time."

he says it like it's obvious, because it is. it's the one thing neither of them can get out of their heads.

"i'd take you so many places, i'd take you to the rodeo, to all the best restaurants, to the fair.."

sapnap pictures it in his mind. long night walks by the beach, rainbow lights in a ferris wheel, popcorn at the movies, stolen kisses behind street corners. his george.

he would be so warm in his arms, his lips so gentle and his hair so fluffy.

"i can't wait."

but despite the anticipating words, george's gleeful expression is faltering. it's cracking at the edges, peeling off almost like a mask. sapnap feels that same disappointment washing over him. he knows it all too well at this point.

"fuck," he swears under his breath, "why do you have to be so far away?"

his fingertips brush against george's face, but it's not soft like he hoped. instead it's made of hard glass. fake.

"it's unfair."

it's so unfair. all he wants is to hold his baby, to be close to him, to shower him in love. but the world couldn't even give him that.

"what if i just drain the stupid ocean?" sapnap suggests, "then i could walk over to you. or what if i moved the land closer? or teleported?"
"you're ridiculous," george chuckles.
"i'd do anything."

he would. he really would do anything. move mountains, fight wars, wander through deserts. anything for his george.

his eyelids fall shut and he lets his mind drift away. he pretends that the brunet is right there next to him, curled up beneath the sheets like he is. his slender fingers would comb through sapnap's hair, so gently that it would put him on the brink of sleep. then they would run across his jawline, scratch his beard in all the right spots.

he imagines that, and it feels like heaven for a few seconds. but then george speaks up, ruining the illusion. once again he's nothing more than pixels on a screen.

"do you want to watch the stars with me?"

he sits up, stretching the arm that he isn't using to hold his phone.

"i don't know if there are any stars out right now, but sure," sapnap replies.

they get out of bed together, and put on hoodies together. george walks over to the balcony door in his apartment while sapnap pushes a window open. he should've checked before he said anything, because outside the dark sky is riddled with stars, each one brighter than the previous.

"dude, it's beautiful.."
"it's a little cloudy but, i can still see them," george comments.

despite the distance between them they still share the night sky, and it's reassuring. whenever sapnap can see the moon coming up george is the first thing he thinks about. maybe he's watching the same moon at the exact same time, if he's not sleeping.

"i love trying to find constellations, though usually you can't see that many in england. orion is easy to find, or at least the belt."
"is it the hourglass one?" sapnap asks.
"yeah, looks kinda like an hourglass. and the belt is the three stars across the middle of it."

sapnap looks around to try and spot it. he has to lean out over the windowsill to see properly. the evening air is fresh, not cold but not particularly warm either.

to his left is the shape that he was looking for. six stars, connected in the middle by three linear ones. some are a little hard to see because of light pollution, but the belt proudly shines through.

"can you see it?" george wonders.
"yeah."
"me too."

they both speak using their softest voices, as if they're afraid to interrupt the moment. it's almost magical. if only the distance was erased.

"when you're here i'll watch the stars with you every night," sapnap mumbles, "we'll go out to the park and you can hold me for as long as you like."
"i'd love that."

george gazes at him with eyes so lovestruck that it gives sapnap butterflies. he knows that that's exactly how he's gonna look at him when they finally meet in real life. he'll look at him like that and then kiss him over and over.

they stay on facetime for hours, talking and laughing and dreaming together. they stay there until the sun rises in europe and george goes back inside. his sleepy expression makes sapnap's heart skip a beat.

he's about to say goodnight and hang up, but george suggests that they just sleep call instead, like they'd usually do anyway. sapnap couldn't be happier.

he couldn't be happier, watching his lover slowly drift away into a calm, deep sleep. and his last words before he does so; "i love you sapnap. so much."