𝚆𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝙸 𝚆𝚊𝚜... | 𝙴. 𝙺𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚖𝚊

Less, More, & Enough

As Mr. Ectoplasm left the class closing the door behind him you got the sudden urge to bang your head against the table, completely not understanding today's math lesson. Let's be honest though, when did you ever. With one loud bang, you slammed your forehead to the desk, your slight wince not going unnoticed by your fellow 1-A classmates.

You jolted a bit when you felt a light hand rub your back, "Y/N, are you okay there?" Peeling your head from the desk you saw Kirishima stare down at you with worry.

Visibly relaxing you replied, "Not really, I can never understand a thing that comes out of Mr.Ectoplasam's mouth."

Kiri chuckled lightly before reassuring you that you weren't alone and that it's manly to ask for help sometimes. To sweeten the deal and hopefully make you feel better, Kirishima invited you to sit with the Bakusquad at lunch. You start to feel butterflies flutter in your stomach and you accept his offer, looking forward to spending more time with him.

To be honest you've had a crush on Kiri for a while. You started to notice the little things about him. The way he rubs the back of his neck when he gets nervous, the small barely noticeable scar on his right eye, and how he goes out of his way to protect his friends. You've recently come to terms with it after he saved your ass for the thousandth time when a group of students bumped into you, causing you to take a tumble. He called out the rude students and helped you up along with the papers on the floor, offering you a kind smile that you couldn't help but blush at.

Once receiving your lunch from Lunch Rush you brought your tray to the table seeing Denki bothering Bakugo, tick marks already visible on his face. You sat between Kirishima and Sero enjoying the fun banter within the squad. You couldn't help but stare whenever Kirishima laughed or how his sharp teeth would peek out sometimes when he smiled. Too engrossed with admiring him you didn't know who was on the receiving end of those smiles.

As time passed not only have your feelings deepened but your friendship with Kirishima has also grown. You learned that Kirishima went to the same middle school as Mina and she was a big part of why he was at UA. Mina helped show him that it's okay to be afraid and what matters most is your heart's intentions, that fear can't stop him from being a hero. Kirishima holds so much respect for Mina, but you couldn't help the sinking feeling starting to brew in the pit of your stomach.

You looked forward to any time you could spend with Kirishma, treasured the time you guys would walk side by side in the hallways. You were in the middle of telling Kiri a story on your way to the dorms, "Then the banana milk came flying out of his nose... Kirishima you okay?" You followed his gaze and saw him staring at Mina as she walked away from Uraraka and Asui. You nudge him, causing him to spin his head towards you bewildered, "I can go back to the dorms by myself if you want to chat with Mina."

Kiri's eyes widened, "Really Y/N? Are you sure?" With a final nod, he made his way to Mina trying to catch up to her. You stared for a few more seconds before sighing and heading back to your room.

You noticed more often how Kiri went out of his way to talk to Mina, help her with homework, and cheer her up when she was down. You wanted to hate Mina so badly for taking the only person to treat you right, but you couldn't. She was such an angel, she was so bright and memorizing. Mina had her arms draped over Kirishima's shoulders while he sat at his desk, peeking at his notes, teasing him about his messy handwriting. You couldn't fathom hating someone that makes Kirishima so happy. Pushing your feelings aside you turned the other way focusing your attention on whatever Deku was muttering about.

Kirishima wasn't the only one who noticed your sudden change, the teachers had spoken to you about your dropping grades. Not only have your grades suffered but your mental health took a hit. You distanced yourself from the Bakusquad as much as you could without being too suspicious. You thought if you slowly went away it wouldn't hurt when Kirishima would inevitably ask Mina out. Whenever Kirishima brought up your weird personality change, you hid behind fake smiles and would divert the conversation back to Kirishima asking him about the latest news on Mina causing him to usually blush.

You fully supported Kirishima and Mina, how selfish would you be if you denied him happiness. He deserved all the happiness in the world, and you couldn't do that for him. If truth be told, you encouraged him multiple times to talk to Mina about his crush on her. After the fifth time, he decided to take your advice. The next day he showed up to class with a smile on his face and Mina wrapped around his arm.

It was late on a Friday night and the common room was abandoned, giving you the perfect time to escape and relax from the stress-filled week, until the reason for your stress made its presence known. You tried to make a run for it but were quickly restrained by your elbow.

"Y/N you have to stop running away! This has been going on for far too long."

"I have no idea what you're talking about Kirishima."

"Oh, I think you do! You lock yourself up in your room, never come up to hang out with the squad, you constantly look depressed, and your grades are dropping! What's happening? Please tell me, you can trust me."

You sigh in defeat. "Don't worry about it Kiri, it isn't important."

"Lies! It's important if it's stopping me from hanging out with my friend! Let's be honest here, this all started a little bit before Mina and I got together!"

"What does that have to do with anything!"

"I don't know Y/N, you tell me!"

Your head is facing down towards the ground hands balled into tight fists, chest rising up and down rapidly. "You wanna know why," Kiri silently nods his head waiting for answers "it's because I loved you okay!"

Kirishima's eyes widened, he couldn't believe the words that had come out of your mouth. It didn't make sense, you were the one that told him to tell Mina about his feelings. Why would you do that if you liked him? He thought your weird behavior was because you were jealous. Jealous that you weren't getting the same amount of attention that you used to.

You slowly raised your head not hearing Kiri say anything after a while. Finally, he could see the tears you've tried so hard to hide all this time. The number of times you've cried to sleep wallowing in self-pity. Kiri hated seeing anyone he cared about cry including you. When he saw the fat tears rolling down your face and the almost silent hiccups escape your mouth, his face grew solemn.

"I'm so sorry Y/N, I never wanted to hurt you. I didn't want to hurt anybody! I'm supposed to protect people! That's why I became a hero. What kind of hero am I if all I'm doing is hurting you!"

"This is why I didn't want to tell you. You always put the burden on yourself, I knew you would blame yourself. You are so, so kind and selfless, Kirishima," you hiccupped.

After a quick gulp, you continued. "So, how could I ever come in between you and someone who makes you so happy? I would rather suffer for a bit than sit there and watch your smile leave your face. You deserve so much better Kiri."

It was a lot to process but all that was on Kiri's mind was the need to comfort you, always putting others before himself. He ran into you pulling you into the tightest hug he could muster and whispered as a tear ran down his face. "I'm sorry Y/N I pushed you too hard and made you cry. That wasn't very manly of me. I want you to know that you mean so much to me and I don't want to lose you as a friend."

"I guess you're stuck with me," you replied with a light-hearted laugh. "Are we good now?"

"Yeah, we're good." With one last glance and an awkward smile, Kiri said, "Once again I'm sorry" before walking away back to his room.

With tears still in your eyes you brought a hand up to wipe them away and whispered, "No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I lied to you. I still love you." You followed Kirishima's lead and walked back to your room missing the body that had rounded the corner after the coast was clear.