Stay (Mxmxmxb)

Chapter 3

Short chapter

      Maybe it was worth the energy to try to escape. I can feel people staring at me since I rarely come to the cafeteria, usually sleeping through lunch in a quiet place. I groan quietly, starting to turn around to leave already but Xavier chuckles, wrapping his arms tighter around my shoulders and forcing me over to a couple of his friends. They glanced over at me before going back to talking, it was obvious they didn't really care. Fortunately. Zachary removes Xavier's arm from my shoulder before gesturing for me to follow him to get food while Xavier introduces me to the group. Following Zachary with Elizabeth, who was hiding on the other side of Zachary, I'm practically forced to order food which meant I had to pay.
    
    Zachary started to pay for me but I quietly stopped him, pulling out my wallet, forgetting for a moment how much money is in there and having to sort through the hundred bills. "Why do you not get lunch if you have the money for it?" He murmurs as we head to the table, uncomfortable I look away, "I dislike loud places, and people. I'd rather not eat if it means I have to be here." I grumble as I sit down beside Xavier, not thinking over it since he's the one who invited me. Zachary gives me a disapproving look at my response, "It's important to eat three meals a day Kryton. How many do you typically eat?" he mother hens quietly over me and I shrug, "Doesn't matter, I'm eating." I grumble as I take a bite of the unappealing pizza. "Kryton, where were you before you came here? I remember you transferred in the middle of the semester." Xavier asks curiously, throwing his arm back around my shoulders.
 
     I fight the urge to punch him, my body tensing up a little under his arm, "Downtown of XXXX in XX." I murmur, forcing another bite of the pizza to go down. Where I used to live had gangs, drugs and had a terrible reputation. I was even involved with gangs at one point, it was hard not to go down there. It offered me a little more protection, along with for my family if I was useful so in my opinion I don't exactly regret it. There was a bit of a tense silence for a long moment before one of Xavier's friends spoke up, "That place is full of gangs. Have you killed someone before?" I'm not surprised that was the first question they asked after learning where I lived but instead of answering I gave him a short cold glare, making his eyes drop nervously and back off almost immediately.
 
      The bell rings a moment later, everyone in an awkward silence, most likely since I didn't answer the question. I stand quietly, dumping my tray and stacking it on the stand beside the trash can, "See you around." I mumble to Zachary before disappearing to my next class. Sitting down in my next class, some type of woodworking class. Agriculture I think but I honestly have no clue. (In my Agriculture class we had a woodworking part as well so yeah)
  
    Unfortunately for me that girl Elizabeth and Zachary share this class with me. I sit as far from them as I can, putting my head down on the cool table's surface while trying to be as invisible as I can. It doesn't work as Zachary sits down beside me, Elizabeth sitting down in front of him, putting distance between us while practically radiating anxiety like before. The teacher walks in, talking loudly about classroom rules while I bury my face into my arms to block out his voice, my body tensing up from irritation. I distantly hear Zachary ask what's wrong but before I know it I'm out of the classroom, feeling a panic attack building up. Too many memories popping up from the earlier conversation, too loud. Why is everything so fucking loud.
 
    Locking myself in the bathroom stall I cover my ears, curling into a ball on the toilet seat, my body tense and trembling as if I was freezing. -A mangled body flung out on the wet street, blood mixed with the rain as it makes its way down the street to where I stand numbly.-A baseball bat flashes across my vision before red flickers and a pained cry leaves my lips with a sickening crack coming from my shoulder.- A needle held in the hand of one of the three guys standing in front of me, my bruised bony arms held up shakily in front of me. Two of the guys easily hold me down as the other guy brings the needle menacingly closer, "Let's see if even the small pipsqueak can build muscles, yeah?"- Loud banging on the stall door distracts me from the memories piling up and taking over, I unconsciously desperately open the door, crashing into Zachary. I recoil immediately, jerking back so fast that I slam into the toilet and let out a whine from the pain. Then the memories of seeing my distraction from Zachary start to surface again, the pain aiding in the slow domination of the panic attack, having subsided and now returning.
 
    "Fuck, why is everything so fucking loud?!" I snap as I slam my fist sideways into one of the stall walls before my hands desperately try to cover my ears, my fingers digging into my hair and most likely pulling out strands. "Kryton.. calm down.." I distantly hear a voice murmur, it was familiar but honestly everything here is familiar, those three guys, the needle, the baseball bat, the body. The noise, I hate this ringing, please make it stop! Feeling my hands fisting into a shirt, I jolt, returning to the present. Zachary was lifted against the bathroom wall, my hands gripping his shirt tightly and I stumbled back, returning to my senses mostly, though the tremors are still running through my body.
    
    "I.." I start coughing from the pain of talking, my hand coming up and massaging my throat. I might've been screaming but I have no clue. "You were making a really high pitched keening noise. I can get you some water if it'll help? Let's go to the nurse, you can also rest.." Zachary murmurs carefully, wary of me. I can't blame him, I did just lift him like he was nothing and hold him hostage against a wall in the middle of a panic attack. I shake my head, backing away as I hold my head, still fighting off the memories and wanting to stay far away from everyone. "No." I snap before flinching, jerking back again.
  
      Zachary sighs, gesturing for me to look at him slowly, I do so and he gives me a surprisingly calm understanding look to which I reply with a wary stare. "Let's work out, see who can reach fifty pushups first?" He suggests and I slowly nod after a moment, going down into pushup formation and slowly starting, struggling mostly from the trembling. Zachary, of course, performed his pushups flawlessly and steadily. By the time I reached fifty, he was waiting patiently and I was calmer, not shaking much anymore and my breathing more steady. "How'd.." I cough, rubbing my throat before trying again, "How'd you know.. it would help?" I ask hoarsely, my voice far from recovering from my panic attack.
  
    Zachary calmly assesses me before standing and I follow suit, "Xavier. Whenever he gets stressed he works out." He explains as he takes me to the nurse, buying a water bottle from a vending machine for me on the way. I don't bother paying at that moment, my eyes droopy and my body aching from all the stress it's been under today. I take a small dip of the water, wincing as it runs down my throat before taking a quick step over to the trashcan and throwing up, my body rejecting the water since I'm hydrophobic from bad experiences. Well there goes any chance of eating or drinking anything today.
 
      I cough quietly, panting heavily as I dizzily lean on the trashcan, it's wheels moving it a little but Zachary steadies it, gently rubbing my back. "I need.. my medicine. My heart is.. acting up. I forgot to take them at.. lunch." I mumble breathlessly, my heart beating in my chest unsteadily. Fantastic, a panic attack and now my enlarged heart is acting up. Zachary wraps his arm around my waist and helps me to the nurse office. The nurse immediately gave me my medicine, I was typically really good about taking my medicine but with all that happened I forgot. "Kryton, Cardiomegaly is very serious, you have to take your medicine regularly. On time." She worriedly scolds me and I nod, "Forgot. Sorry." I mumble weakly, absently still clutching Zachary's shirt, needing someone to stabilize me currently.
 
       Zachary tried to gently get me to drink some water but I just avoided it, clenching his shirt a little tighter as my mouth tightened, leaning back. "Oh, Kryton is.. somewhat hydrophobic. If he's having a bad day his body rejects water. He does, however, like grape juice, the only drink he really likes. I'll go get some, I'll be right back, boys." She explained before disappearing, her thin body leaving the room swiftly. "Are you feeling better now?" Zachary asks, a soft concern in his voice that uncustomed to. I hum, trying to hide how obviously sleepy I am, "I'm fine." I lie quietly, though is it really a lie if I'm alive? Isn't being alive technically fine?
 
      Feeling Zachary place his hand in my hair, I recoil a little but still he touches my head, soothingly petting my head as if I was a dog that needed comfort. And similar to a dog, I growl at him but stop when I look into his eyes. Gentle. It's the only word to describe the way he was looking at me. As if he knew that maybe I wasn't fine and wanted to be there for me. My hand tightens on his shirt and I look away, not complaining as I let him continue with the petting. Without my consent I slowly drift off into sleep, too exhausted to fight it off anymore. Safe with this soft kindness I've never felt from anyone before.