Meeting The Light

Chapter 21

“A drunk mind speaks a sober heart” -Unkown.

Song of the chapter:

Maroon 5 – Daylight.

~Chap. 21~

Roxanne's P.O.V

I stared at the ceiling, not able to sleep. It was too late and I knew that I was going to regret staying awake next morning, but I didn't care. Everything felt so useless and I didn't feel like thinking. I was numb.

Whenever I remembered what happened this afternoon, my tears started flowing again. I cried silently, feeling too weak to even sob.

What have I ever done?

I wondered. I never knew why Noah was treating me so horribly. And for the first time, I felt like I was a burden. I started realizing how much of a burden I had been. The ugly, weird girl who knew nothing about the world. I bet he had gotten fed up with me. He probably wanted to be around smarter people, who knew everything and had a normal life.

Yeah, why should he care?

I thought bitterly. His words echoed in my mind, piercing my heart and hurting me severely. I regretted everything. I should have never let him in. I should have never talked to him that day, I should have just closed my window. I probably wouldn't be hurting so much right now.

I should have...I should have.

I should have expected this. But instead, I opened my heart for him to see. I let him in, I let him talk to me and I let him be my friend. And I felt too stupid for doing so.

Noah probably didn't even need me in his life. I should end this and try to fix it all. I'll try and bring everything back to normal. I would get out of his life, as if I never met him, as if I never noticed the pebbles he threw at my window that day when he heard me singing.

I would have rather had a life full of agony, than a life full of false hope. I would have rather lived with getting hit and spit on by my family every day, than live happy moments that made me hope for living a normal life. And I most certainly would have rather stayed the miserable way I had been, than have those breathless moments that made my heart stop with happiness.

Because it damn hurts when it ends.

“Roxy?” a voice croaked. I sat up quickly, startled and gripping the sheets.

I started looking around in fear, was I going mad, hearing voices and stuff? Was my misery absorbing me finally, to throw me into insanity?

I looked at the other side of the room where my window was, there was a shadow of someone sitting on the window sill, blocking the dim moonlight. I screamed in horror.

“Jeez, be quiet. It's me,” the shadow whispered. I stood up shakily, who is this?

I knew I had to find something to defend myself, I got hold of the random baseball bat that was in my room, the same one I intended to hit Noah with when he first knocked on my window. I pushed away the memory as I started approaching whoever that was sitting on my window sill.

I stopped in my tracks and dropped the bat from my grip. It was when I could make up his face, I was about one foot away and I just stared at him dubiously. How could I miss his voice?