Serendipity

Seven.

I saw the two of them dancing, giggling to each other, and lastly... kissed. It felt like my heart is about to be ripped out from my body. It hurt that damn much. It hurts too much. I could feel my shirt getting wet. I know my tears have already escaped my eyes. I ran to my room and sat at the edge of my bed while my hands are on my head.

"UGH! Why!" I screamed. Fuck it. FUCK IT. It hurts. It really hurts. She likes him. She does. She has moved on. She's already forgotten about us. About me.

I can't phantom the idea and feeling of this pain.

"Y/N!!!!!!!" I screamed as I shut my eyes. All of our moments together have gone through my mind which made me cry harder.

- flashback

"And for our first dance, we have Jungkook." The host said. I grabbed 1 purple rose and I smiled at her while she's waiting for me to come to her. Her eyes glued at me.

"You look beautiful." I said as I handed her a rose. She gladly took it.

"Thank you. You don't look bad yourself." She said and smiled sweetly.

"Y/N, I've been meaning to ask you this..." I started and gulped. Her eyes are still looking at me while I held her on her waist, slow dancing.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" I asked. She looked surprised like she was about to cry.

Her father gave a thumbs up since I've asked his
permission beforehand.

She hugged me tightly.

"Yes. Yes! Yes!!! A thousand times Yes!!" She said while hugging me.

My heart was thumping.

"You can't take this back now, Mr. Jeon!" She warned which made the both of us laugh.

"Who said about taking it back???" I teased her.

- end of flashback

We were both laughing with tears on our eyes. It was the happiest day of our lives. I held into my chest as I could feel the pain physically. I grabbed all the beers inside my fridge and started chugging it down.

Is this what she felt when I was being naive back then? The moment she saw me kissing another girl? That stabbing pain that you could physically feel. I've heard stories from our friends that she wasn't going out of her room, not even to eat.

As I'm in my deep thoughts, I could hear my door unlocked. I didn't even bother to look thinking it was the room service.

I felt someone's weight on my shoulder. I looked back and I saw Y/N. Am I that drunk for me to see her here?

"Jungkookie" she called me. I can hear her slurs.

It means she's drunk.

I held her hand and guided her to sit beside me.

"You're drunk" I commented.

"At least I won't remember coming here" she said. Her eyes are half closed.

"Why? Why are you here?" I asked while looking at her.

"Jungkookie.. why are you back? Why are you here?" She asked and this time she managed to look at me.

"I came for you. I wanted to talk to you. To fix things up." I answered truthfully.

"What for, Kook? You know we will never be able to go back to how it used to be right?" She said sounding hurt.

"Why do you think we will never go back to the way it was?" I asked.

"I can never trust you again, Kook.. you know how my dad hurt my mom by cheating with his secretary.. Even if I want to work things out, I just can't. It's such a traumatic experience that just seeing you here suffocates me." She said and wow, that stung.

"You don't want me here?" I asked again. Tears are forming from my eyes.

"Hmm... I just feel hurt that you're here all of a sudden." She said while playing with her fingers.

"Y/N... can I have the chance to please explain what happened that night? Please..." I begged and tears started falling from my eyes.

"Oh Kookie.. don't cry. Please." She said while wiping my tears.

"When you came that night, Rose have come and visited us while we're at our training. I was so naive back then to know what was she after. I didn't know that she liked me. I didn't even tell the boys I have someone here which is you since we are all just getting to know each other and it's one of the things BigHit was strict about. I know I have explained that to you. I never kissed back. I didn't even think twice when I was kissed by her. I immediately stepped back and told her that I have a girlfriend. And the moment you stopped replying to my messages, it felt like my heart is about to jump out of my body... I felt so hopeless and helpless since I have no other choice but to stay where I was." I said while holding her hand.

"I regret it every single day that I was that naive. That gullible. I never noticed because I'm only set with you..." I added.

"I came back because we've dreamt of being successful together. I kept in touch with your father despite of his disappointment. When I became "this" big star as people say, I've always thought about you because you were my first fan. And I hope it remained that way..." I said while crying my heart out.

She was also crying. She hugged me tightly.

"Ohh kookie..." she exclaimed while hugging me.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I know you had a hard time." I said while rubbing her back.

"You don't know how much I missed you.." I added.

She cried even louder.

"I understand kookie... I'm sorry. I never tried to listen." She said while patting my back.

"It's okay, Y/nshie... I think I would have done the same." I said while moving back to see her face.

"Jungkookie... let's move forward. I don't want us to be looking at our past anymore. We have so much regret and what ifs... we have to move past it." She suddenly said calmy.

"But isn't that what supposed to bring us together again, Y/N?" I asked curiously.

"Kookie..." She said.

"Is it because of Jimin?" I asked with full of courage even if I'm scared of the answer.

"No. He has nothing to do with this." She exclaimed and sighed.

"I just need to figure things out on my own, Jungkook. It's hard to just jump into my emotions like I used to... I'm scared." She added.

"Y/N, if you're thinking about me.. regarding your relationship with Jimin. Please don't. Please be happy. Jimin hyung has changed when he met you. It was so drastic like he was at peace already, and you looked so happy with him. I don't want to ruin that. I'll be okay. Jimin and I will have to talk about this in the future." I said truthfully even if it hurts.

"That's not what I meant..." she said but I know deep inside she's already confused. I can see that through her.

"It's okay, y/n. Like you said, let's move forward. This is how we're going to move forward. I can always be your friend like the old times." I said and held her hand.

She just nodded.