girl y/n x chat noir

A Chat With Y/N

Adriens pov//

I'm sitting in my humongous room, simping over Ladybug even though she's dead. "Hey, Plagg, do you think we can visit Ladybug's grave tomorrow?" My voice quavers.

"Simp," he replies, glaring at me.

"I'll bring your favorite cheese along?" Of course, this makes Plagg perk right up. He's really been affected by Ladybug's death: he's turning into an asshole. Scratch that, more of an asshole.

You know who else is an asshole? Lucky Red Spots. God I hate her. Yeah, it's pretty hard to fill Ladybug's shoes, but Lucky Red Spots doesn't even have feet. That's how inept and incompetent she is at everything. I glance back down at the picture of Ladybug in my hands. Beautiful, perfect Ladybug. Actually, she was kind of an asshole too, but I'm not about to speak ill of the dead. A teardrop falls from my eyes and marrs Ladybug's face, joining countless other teardrops from the weeks since her death. Her face is all blurry and water-damaged now.

Suddenly, Tikki flies through the window. Like my teardrops, she marrs something perfect. My perfect moment of mourning my love is gone. Now I have to deal with Tikki: another asshole to complete the Living Asshole Trifecta. She used to be nice, kind of annoying, but nice, but ever since her owner died, she's an asshole. But I can't really blame her. Lucky Red Spots' assholeness is probably just rubbing off on her.

"Hey, Plagg," Tikki moans, then proceeds to make out with him. It lasts a painfully long amount of time. I avert my eyes to avoid damaging my braincells. You'd need eye-bleach after that. Could I cataclysm my own eyeballs? Or would that kill me?

"Wow, Tikki, you even wore cheese-flavored Chapstick," Plagg moans in tandem.

At this point I'm completely done with this. I jump out the window and go splat on the ground before I remember that I'm a superhero, so I stop going splat and start running fast. I have no friends left, really, since they were all actually Marrinete's friends. But now she's dead. And they all hate me. Nino, Alya, Julyka, Rose, Alex, Max: every last one. So I mosey on over to my new crush's house: (Y/N).

I walk through the front door and am greeted by (Y/N)'s mom. "Hey, (Mom/name)!" I say seductively. "What's cookin', goodlookin'?"

"I have pumpkin stew," she answers, not even looking at me. She hates me, but I don't care. I will win over her daughter's hand in marriage. Why she gotta be so ru-ude? Doncha know I'm human toooooo? I'm gonna marry her anyway! Marry that girl-

The mom cuts my love song off, swinging the pumpkin stew ladle to hit my face. I dodge because I'm a ninja and I run up to (Y/N)'s room, pounding on the door and begging for her to let me in.

Of course, she does, because we are best buddies. "Hi, Adrien," she says through a mouthful of flour. (Y/N) shoves yet another spoonful of flour into her mouth. "Want some?"

Now, an ordinary guy might find this offputting or disturbing, but I, for one, find this quite... hot. The way the flour enters her mouth reminds me of just how much I want to kiss those beautiful lips of (Y/N)'s. So I walk closer to her. "Yes, I would love to join you in your snack!"

"Did you know," she smiles, "I'm actually eating this flour so that I can make bread with it?" I am a bit confused. "Yeah," (Y/N) continues, "it mixes with the acid in my stomach, turns into bread, and then I can regurgitate it. I sell it at the farmer's market."

"So you do this... repeatedly?" My eyes glaze over at the thought. How beautiful, how saintly, how gorgeous!

(Y/N) nods. "Every Tuesday!"

Suddenly, I see a flash of red. And an annoying but familiar voice, screeching. "I'VE TOLD YOU FOR THE HUNDREDTH TIME!!!! DON'T EAT FLOUR YOU DIMWIT!!!!! YOU'RE GONNA GET A YEAST INFECTION!!!!"

I pause. "Tikki...?"

----end of chapter 2----

Author's notes: ahh this was a really fun chapter to write! I like it a lot more than the last one uwu I really like adriens pov

I can really see the story coming together (っ＾▿＾)💨

Make sure to leave a comment i love reading those they make me happy ~~

All art credit to artists ~