Summary: The last time Ethan sees Josie before he leaves for the Amazon
Ethan places his phone on his desk, his flight to Brazil is all booked all that's left now is to drive to the airport. Fly to Brazil and leave Boston behind. Leave her behind.
He doesn't want to leave her, he wants nothing more than to go to be with her. But he has to go, not just for himself but for her too. He has to put distance between them, both physically and emotionally. He cannot be involved with her. He should not have got involved with her in the first place. Almost every part of him hates himself for allowing her to sneak her way into his heart.
Almost.
He is too trapped in his own thoughts that he doesn't hear Josie enter his office.
"So, I guess this is going to be a bit of problem for us then". She stands there awkwardly, closing the door to his office behind her. His eyes dart towards her, drawing him in like a moth to a flame. "I know you said that we can't be anything but colleagues, but me being on the team will definitely complicate things and I'm not just going to stand here and pretend that I don't-" She doesn't get to finish as his lips are on hers. He catches her off guard and she freezes, but only momentarily as she soon responds. Kissing him back with just as much passion, if not more.
She is surrounded by him. Her head full of thoughts of him, and only him. His cologne invading her sense of smell. His body pressing her against the wall of his office. His hand in her hair. His other caressing her face, feeling every part of her as though it is the last time he ever will. He knows it has to be the last time and he hates it.
Suddenly she pulls away from his lips, her eyes searching his "Ethan" she whispers breathlessly. "What are you-" he silences her, placing his finger on her lips.
"Shh, not now". His lips find hers again, trying to remember the shape of her lips. The taste of them. The feel of her lips on his, carving the memory of them into his brain so that he never forgets them, no matter how much he knows he has to.
And she does the same, her hands wandering all of his body, on his chest feeling his heartbeat thumping against her hand. Her hands in his hair. Her hands caressing his stubbled face, trying to remember the feel of him. Carving the memory of him into her brain.
He tears his lips from hers, just as suddenly as he had placed them there.
"I have to go" he whispers. His eyes still focused on her lips, urging to taste them again. But he doesn't. He can't.
I want nothing more than to stay here in your arms.
I want nothing more than to wake up with you in my arms everyday.
I want nothing more than to kiss you in front of the entire world.
I want you more than anything else I've ever wanted in my entire life.
I love you.
All these thoughts enter his brain, swarming him but he doesn't say any of it. Instead he lets go of her, walks out the door and drives to the airport.
