Burn

CHAPTER 24

Monday lunchtime found all three of them sequestered away in the library, pouring over the worn pages of Tenebrarum praesentibus adhiberetur: De Dcemone Encylopedia.

It was as though nothing had changed from last week, even though, to Carter, it felt like everything had.

Margo brought several ham and cheese sandwiches to a small desk by a window and carefully skimmed each line, impatiently brushing hair from her face and crumbs from her lap. Ryu, despite this having been his idea, claimed boredom after several minutes and slunk off to investigate the stacks.

Carter held a suspicion he wasn't as comfortable with his exorcism as he made out to be.

Carter, for his part, tried his best to stay calm. He sat across from Margo and tore his own sandwich into increasingly tiny pieces, stomach roiling with nerves, and answered the occasional question. For the most part, he was happy to just be a sounding board for Margo's ideas, guilty at being unhelpful but too focused on trying to avoid a freak out.

However, when the bell rang to signal next period and they'd only made it halfway through the spells, a cold sweat broke across Carter's entire body and icy fear began to permeate his veins.

"It's okay," Margo soothed, clearly noting his distress. "We have time. We'll find something. We just have to-"

"Hey, Carter?"

Anthony's voice sounded cautiously behind him; Margo and Carter both tensed and exchanged wide-eyed stares.

"Can I talk to you?"

"Er..." When Carter turned to face him, he braced himself for a flash of fury, for anger to rise within him like a breaking tide. But when he looked at Anthony, shifting awkwardly on his feet, face flushing, he felt...nothing.

He'd been so hurt when it'd first happened, when he'd first caught Anthony, but so much had happened since then-and now? Now he didn't have the energy for anger any more.

He was still hurt, of course, but only in the way he'd be hurt if anyone cheated on him. He wasn't particularly upset it was Anthony who had done it, nor did he particularly miss him. Which was probably pretty telling.

So as Carter stared into Anthony's sullen face, he vowed to hear him out, remain calm, and let him go.

And then Anthony opened his mouth.

"You look like shit," he said.

Carter frowned and ran a hand through his (now recently-washed) hair. "Gee, thanks."

Anthony winced. "That's not what I-look, I'm sorry. That was a garbage thing to say." He sighed and tugged nervously on a hoodie string. "Look, I-"

"It's okay," Carter broke in quickly. "I saw it, it happened, and that's that. Let's just...agree to see other people. Okay?"

But Anthony's brow furrowed at his breezy tone. "You don't even care?" He demanded.

Now it was Carter's turn to sigh. "Of course I do. But if I'm honest, I've got a lot on my plate right now, and I don't really have the time-"

"No, you never have the time," Anthony laughed bitterly. "Do you? I was always just trying to remain high enough on your priority list to warrant a second glance."

Carter blinked at him in bemusement. His mind hummed, blank and useless, in his skull. "Okay," he said finally, "okay. Clearly you had some issues with me you weren't expressing, and that's okay. I just wish you'd communicated with me better instead of...you know."

The word cheating hung between them like a bad smell.

"Oh, so now it's my fault?" Anthony snapped.