living on a fault line || Jensoo

Chapter 15

Charlie practically inhales the pasta.

She chases the peas with her fork, her tongue trapped between her teeth in concentration, and Jennie smiles at her antics. Her little girl is so happy, so bright, so optimistic, she can hardly reconcile that with hiding a photograph to remind her of both of them.

She knows Charlie. She knows what seeing she and Jisoo together and happy means to her.

And she's so incredibly sorry she hasn't been better at it.

She and Jisoo couldn't give her the family she deserved, but even after the divorce happened, Jennie feels like she didn't try hard enough, pushed Jisoo enough, for them to be civil and kind and co-parent their kid with mutual respect.

And now Jisoo is leaving.

And Jennie is worried about it, of course she is, and she thinks Jisoo is making a mistake, that she's about to hurt Charlie yet again -and she doesn't know how to reconcile that with the fact their daughter needs to see them be good to each other.

Her vibrating cell-phone shakes her out of her thoughts.

She looks down, and next to her full plate a number she doesn't recognize flashes on the screen.

Her heart is on her throat.

"One second, honey," she tells Charlie, who looks up from her nearly empty plate.

"Who is it?" She asks.

She doesn't answer Charlie.

She's been waiting to hear from the Sullivan Breast Clinic, and she has a feeling it's the call she's been waiting for.

She answers the phone.

"Hello?"

"Miss Kim, hello."

Dr.Lowry's voice on the other end of the line makes her stomach sink. She sits down, because it feels like the rug is being pulled from under her feet, and the woman has barely said three words yet.

Doctors rarely call their patients themselves about lab results.

No, no, no. Please.

"I was calling you about your biopsy-"

"Yes?"

"I'm afraid the results have been delayed as I've ordered some extra testing, I wanted to call you myself about it. Dr.Watson called me about your case, and I can assure you we're-"

"Extra testing?" She doesn't mean to interrupt, but her voice, her hands, are shaking. "That's bad, isn't it? It's... It's bad. I'm a doctor, if things were right you wouldn't need-"

"Miss Kim," Dr.Lowry sounds compassionate. "Jennie. I know what you're thinking, and this is not a confirmation that it's cancer. It's not. It's just a delay, and I wanted to call you specifically to address those worries."

She takes a deep breath, and tries to calm herself down.

"Okay. Of course. Thank- thank you."

"I wanted to ask you a few questions, as well," Dr.Lowry says.

Jennie nods, doesn't even realize the woman can't see her.

"Have you noticed any new symptoms since I last saw you?"

Jennie forces herself to swallow.

"No...Uh, no. Just what we spoke about, the pain and the mass. And even the pain itself has been decreasing."

"Have you noticed any nipple discharge? Or bleeding?"

A shiver runs through Jennie.

"No...no."