Hellfire

Chapter Twenty-Eight

I was rigid, flames spitting and my eyes shining like twin moons as Tabitha folded herself neatly into the chair opposite me. I tensed up. I knew what was about to happen. She'd done it six hours prior and twelve hours before that. She was going to root about in my mind and get me to accept my fear of Lucius, something I refused to do. I didn't want to be scared of him. He didn't deserve it.

Tabitha sucked on the end of a glowing cigarette and puffed out a cloud of smoke. 'You know how this works. The sooner you accept your fear, the sooner you'll adjust and your fire will calm. Every time you ignore your emotions or bottle them up, you become the fire.'

I jostled my knee as my temper rose.

'I told you before, just make it stop. Tell me not to be scared of him or take out the memory.' I growled out, breathing my own smoke that reeked of brimstone and hell. 'Just shut it down.'

'That doesn't solve anything.'

I tightened my jaw. 'He doesn't deserve this. Just do something. Cut the fear out of me. Turn things to the way they once were.'

She sighed. 'I can't. Eva is the only one who has managed to keep a spell going in you. I do that, it'll just unravel and you'll be back at square one.'

'This isn't his fault!' I snapped out.

Tabitha bared her teeth. 'It is. He let himself do as he wanted. He let his guard down. He let his addiction get the better of him.' Tabitha said sharply as she tapped the cigarette over the edge of the ashtray irritably. 'He should never have blurred the lines between you two. As a result, he's been feeding that dangerous side of himself. He let the monster out.'

Insult burned through me, making me leap up and jab a finger towards her.

'Lucius isn't a monster!' I snarled with crackling heat.

'Your instincts say otherwise, and your instincts are there to protect you. Right now, in his current state, Lucius is unsafe for you. Even he knows this. Listen to what your body says and embrace it, then you can move on and put a stop to the explosions whenever you see him.'

Impatience rose, making me stalk around like a caged wolf. I wanted to just bottle it up and brush it away, but nothing was letting me. Whenever I kept trying to remember the good of him, how calm and safe I felt when it was just the two of us in his office, listening to him speak with that velvet voice, watch him prowl in the corner of my eye, and the cold that would brush me whenever I felt a spark of hellfire, it all just vanished into nothing and replaced it with a thing that was malicious and pure evil. A thing that was going to kill me.

I shoved the heels of my palms into my eyes hard. 'You know Lucius. You know who he is. He'd never do that to me.'

'But he did.' Tabitha snarled, baring her pointed teeth. 'He nearly killed you. He would've if his willpower was any weaker. He is a danger to you.'

I was burning hotly now, my breath coming out as tendrils of smoke, my eyes glimmering like pyres. I was moving to leave. I wasn't going to listen to this. I wasn't going to demonise Lucius. But Tabitha lanced into my mind, crashing through my defences. I felt her pulling at my thoughts, my memories, digging out the ones I tried to ignore and bury deep.

He's going to kill me.

He's going to eat me.

He doesn't love me, he just wants my blood.

He's addicted to me, nothing more.

He's not Lucius anymore.

He's a monster.