The Beef-Blowing Monkey

The Beef

One day, there was a young monkey named Ursofamily. He was on his way to his best friend Spoonz's place on a warm summer evening. The air was crisp and the sun was just setting. The river was the only sound that could be heard as all the animals were settling into their burrows after a long day of hard work. However, there was a little monkey that was still frolicking in the fields, looking for some beef to blow. 

Whilst Urso was looking for some beef to blow, he encountered many obstacles along the way. There was a storm that was beginning to approach the little monkey and he had to find cover as soon as possible. He found solace in a humble abode just at the border of the Great Oak forest. as he entered the house, he realized that this was the infamous hangout of the Breakneck Bandits. He began to quiver in fear as a warm stream of liquid terror crept down his leg. Luckily for him, they seemed to be busy with a board meeting in the back room discussing all sorts of horrific crimes they'd be committing in the coming months. He looked out the window to see if there was any hope he could escape the terrible situation he had put himself in, however, there was no resolve in sight. The storm was erratic and rang out with a tumultuous sound as the lightning shot through the air with incredible force. There was no hope for the beef blowing monkey. 

The end seemed nigh as the bandits were finishing their last comments. They were about walk into the room that contained Urso and a puddle of piss. However, whilst Urso was trembling with fear as the end seemed to be near, a glimpse of hope appeared out of seemingly nowhere. Out of the storm arose a dark figure with a grandiose build. His stature gave off the impression that he has saved thousands of lives and blessed the eyes of many. Urso peaked out the window and this is what filled him with intense relief. As the bandits were about to leave their conference, there was a knock at the door. They began to question themselves and ask if anyone was expecting company. One of the bandits said they ordered Papa John's, but it had been delayed due to the storm. Perplexed as they were, one of the group members cautiously approached the front door. As he was striding towards the entrance, he noticed a trail of liquid that lead to a certain monkey. He ignored it for the time being as the door began to bellow once again with more force than last time. As the member warily opened the door, the stranger barged into the bandit's hideout. The bandit's were quaking in fear as the absolute man that stood in front of them towered over every single person and barely fit through the doorway. He said nothing. Finally, after a minute of awkward silence between the group and the elite that stood in front of them, the leader of the Breakneck Bandit's asked, "May we help you?". As the man gaped with his chiseled jaw, he said, "I'm looking for a beef-blowing monkey by the name of Urso. Have you seen him?".  The group turned their heads to the opposite side of the room where the person in question was. The stranger took note of this and started walking towards him. Urso looked up at the daunting figure before him with dismay. The stranger then said, "Don't worry, I am here to save you from this crisis". Urso responded with a quaint voice, "wh OMEGALUL are you though?". He responded with, "The name is Skipps, LittleBoySkippy". Urso shuddered with excitement. He had heard of the great stories of Skipps, the Hero from the West, and how he had toppled governments, and saved those who were in dire distress. He began to blush and was terribly embarrassed that he reeked of urine. He then picked up the monkey from the floor and walked out as fast as possible. As Urso lay in the arms of Skipps, he had never felt as safe as he did with him.

Skipps carried him for hours as they walked toward his dwelling. Urso was confused by all this and began to ask, "How did you know I was there? Why did you save me? and why do care about me?". Skipps responded with, "Hush my Discord kitten, no need for the questions, what matters is right now. You are safe and that's all that matters". Urso did not this expect this answer and did not ask another question for the remainder of the trip. As they approached the house, Urso was incredibly tired especially after all the adrenaline that coursed through his vains. Skipps set him down on the couch and wrapped him in a blanket. As he set him down, he said "I hope you learned your lesson young monkey, don't go around looking for trouble otherwise you'll end up in a dire situation just as that one. Understood?". The young monkey nodded with agreement. As Urso began to fall asleep, he knew that his days of beef blowing were over. He was not upset by this, rather, felt comfort in the fact that he no longer needed to validation that he obtained from his beef blowing days. As the rain continued downpour, there was a sense of revitalization in the air as the water washed away the dirt from the rocks, and a new future had dawned upon the monkey.