'ℂ𝕒𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕤 𝔻𝕠𝕟'𝕥 ******* 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕐𝕠𝕦' A Comfort Fanfic

.Chapter One.

TRIGGER WARNING: 

-mentions of S.H [s3lf-h4rm]

This is for my friends, me and everyone else who loves Wilbur but isn't feeling great atm <3

[6:30am, 8th of May]
--Y/N's POV--

The ceiling fan was spinning repeatedly, keeping the heat away, though my skin felt cold due to the lack of movement for hours on end. It all felt numb and cold, but I can't be bothered to move from this position. It's almost as if I'm paralysed, as if I couldn't move at all, when I clearly understood I was being over-dramatic and could get up perfectly fine. But why didn't I want to?

My gaze turns to the window on my right, it was getting brighter with each minute, meaning a new day was arriving. Fuck. The thought of dragging myself out of bed and having to face another day of yelling and fighting repeated all day long terrified me, and for that I feel weak. Wilbur, my best friend, was always there and for some reason I smile and laughed around him, even when I felt like dropping dead on the ground, falling asleep and not waking up. I smile and laugh when I imagine a day of complete misery. It's not like I was faking it, my smile and laughter was real but once we're not talking or aren't around each other, I frown and sob. 

How can one's emotions be like this? messed up and fuzzy. It makes me feel sick, as if I really don't want to eat but at the same time I experience mass hunger and eat all of my food. Of course, this ends horribly wrong with me throwing up or crying once more. It's all messed up, fucked up, it's all shitty and it's all fuzzy in my mind-

*stomp stomp stomp*

My mother.

It must be time to get up already.

My gaze travels from the window over to my table-clock.

[6:57am]

-- NARATOR POV--

"Get up, Y/N. It's almost 7am, you need to get ready for school," Y/N's mother Fern mumbled, standing in Y/N's doorway, looking tired and maybe even experiencing a hang-over. Had she drank last night?

"okay, mother," Y/N mumbled in response, getting out of the position Y/N had remained in for hours, sitting up-right. Fern closed the door and walked off, leaving Y/N alone to get ready for the day. The wind was cold, especially with the ceiling fan on, making it slow and difficult for Y/N to get up but managed to it anyways.

--Y/N'S POV--

My legs hurt, I failed last night. I lost my streak of days I had been clean, I kind of just.. snapped. I wish I could talk to someone about this but when I'm close to saying it, my guts shrivel up inside. This feels horrible, mentally and psychically but I get through it just for the sake of seeing daylight after a night of darkness.

I'm up.