The Foolish Adventures Of The Three Little Piglets (bench trio)

(Dont) Blame It On The Kids

''I feel like robbing something today''

''What a terrible idea''

''We literally just woke up, man''

                                                                                              ~~~

''I think this is the part where we run?''

''NO SHIT RANBOO'' the two teenagers scream at the third, one grabbing their hand and the other with the bag already running out the store.

''sorry''  Tubbo, the shortest of the group aka bee boy whispers towards the aghast-looking store worker before leaving only wind after him, with Ranboo, the cursed lanky teen aka Boo, right out behind him. Only for both to stumble back inside as they see Tommy, the slightly shorter lanky boy aka golden retriever boy, running back towards them with the police cars stopping only a couple meters behind him.

''Where's the back exit?!'' Tommy stops before the still-in-horror store worker thats now hiding behind the counter.

''W-we don't have one''

''What kind of shit store doesn't have a back exit, apparently yours, I'm gonna need to write a report or something on yall-'' Tommy still manages to roast the worker before Tubbo interrupts him.

''We do NOT have the time for that right now, you better find a way out of here this instant or I'm letting Ranboo cook for a week'' he shouts.

That was the moment Tommy realized shit getting real. Not because the police officers were getting significantly closer, but because he knows he won't survive another day of that bastard's awfully undercooked hamburgers.

''Hey...what's wrong with my cooking'' Ranboo mumbles with a pretty upset frown.

Tommy and Tubbo both look around for something that would help them rather than acknowledging the question until they hear the cops busting through the doors of the store, approaching rapidly towards them. Tubbo quickly throws a can of Axe Body Spray can at Ranboo before he hits one officer in the head with another can, knocking him out. 

Meanwhile, Tommy breaks a window with a... toaster...? 

''Ha ha, god I hate these things'' he adds after smashing the toaster once more for good measures.

As one officer rapidly approaches Ranboo, the black and white adult child internally panics and ends up spraying the poor man in the face with the Axe Body Spray, which causes the officer to collapse.

''Well I thought you'd hit him in the head or something...but that works as well I guess'' Tubbo stands there for a bit, to say less confused, questioning why he's still friends with them. Then quickly snaps out of it when the officer that got hit in the head, just a few seconds ago, grabs him by the ankle, slowly climbing up, only for Ranboo to spray him in the eyes with the Axe Body Spray can.

''Thanks boss man'' Tubbo quickly smiles at Ranboo ''Now let's get the fuck out of here''

                                                                                             ~~~

''Hah I think that went excellent'' Tommy smirks for himself as he lies down on the edge of the rooftop of their apartment, legs dangling down in the air.

''That was supposed to go well?! '' Tubbo smacks Tommy across the head while walking past. '' We almost got arrested and you're saying it went well?!'' 

''But you got saved by your favorite boss man, absolutely fucking pathetic,'' Tommy adds in a mocking tone and rolls his eyes.

''Ah I see, golden retriever boy is jealous, huh?'' says Tubbo while sitting down next to him.

''Don't call me that! You know I'll push you off, bitch!''

Before Tubbo gets to react, Ranboo shows up behind them.

''God you smell terrible Ranboo'' Tubbo says covering his nose.

''Oh thanks, it must be from the Axe Body Spray I used to absolutely destroy that poor, poor man.''

''At least you don't use it    every day    like someone here.'' they both side-eye Tommy...

''I will fist-fight you and effortlessly win.'' Tommy quickly scowls back.

Tubbo stands up and pushes Ranboo to the stairs.

''Whatever you say blue-eyed blondie'' 

Although Tommy couldn't see Tubbo anymore he could see his little savage smile. But that's not gonna ruin Tommy's day. He's too proud for that.

'I successfully robbed someone and I got-' he thinks to himself as he reaches for the bag next to him only for his hand to fall through air. 

He dropped the bag while running away from the cops. 

His grin slowly fades into a more forced smile.

'Well, at least we got away, which means Ranboo won't cook for a week again, phew haha.'

''Wha- whats that smell?!'' he suddenly almost shrieks.

He was right. It's the scent of starvation.

                                                                                        ~~~

''fuuuuuckkkkkk'' 

''Did you hear that?'' Ranboo asks while flipping the pressed red meat in the toaster with a spatula.

''No clue Boo, anyway I'm going out for dinner. Bye-'' Tubbo cuts off, shutting the door behind him.

''But the burgers are already done... wait no, I forgot the pickles and extra layer of cheese. Now it's done, and ready to be served!''

[notes]

yoooo first chapter 

excited to see some feedback so lemme know if any mistakes (I take criticism well so let it all out : ) )

currently working on a bigger project so maybe stay tuned for that ;)

will try to update regularly but aint making any promises

thx for reading till the end heh

probably should go to sleep but Philzas streaming so no sleep for me