Ashamed

How it all started

They all say sad stories have happy endings.
Or everything happy stays happy. But I agree to disagree.

I was only five when it all started. We were a happy family before then. Mom was perfect, dad was loving and always brought home presents. My elder sister was the best and had just entered high school and I on the other hand was a little cutie. Until one day.

' You're crazy!' I heard dad scream

' I'm crazy? You didn't say that before you married me' my mom sneered

' I should have left you since! But cause of the kids I stayed but I'm not staying and putting up with you again. I only pity our kids.!' dad shot back

' so you're leaving? Just like that?' my mom screamed but her voice sounded calm all the same

' yes I am Lena. And it's for good' my dad stated and everything went dead silent.

I was curled up in a ball in my room on my bed and my elder sister stood by the door to check what had happened. She opened the room door careful not to make any sound so mom and dad will not know their little fight woke us up. I saw the light from Dad's room flicker as he walked out carrying his luggage. I jumped out of my bed running with my tiny legs to meet daddy but joy my elder sister stopped me.

' I don't want daddy to go' I sulked

' shh he'll come back for us..' my sister  wispherd bringing me into her arms and petting me, wiping my tears carefully from my face.
 
But little did we know....

Dad never came back and mom's attitude towards us changed totally.
Mom brought in different men each day, started smoking and stopped taking care of us. She even started drugs and sometimes passed out when she took excess.

This happened on two occasions. The first I had just gotten back from school and met mom lying unconscious I quickly called an ambulance and they pumped the drugs out of her before it made it's way to her heart as she could die.

The second time it was joy who found her, she didn't call the ambulance immediately but she had gathered a crowd at the front of our door step yelling and crying for help. I just came back from school as usual and saw the crowd from a distance, only to find out the crowd was formed right in front of my house. I called the ambulance and mom was taken to the emergency room.

  Joy was very upset after that day and refused to speak to anyone. She was hurt and deep down I knew she wished she had followed dad the day he left. And I too began to regret why I didn't fight my way to meet dad when he was Leaving.

When I turned sixteen joy was very happy and gifted me a phone. She had just finished college and had started working but hardly stayed home cause of mom.
She acted as the mother figure in my life, coming to meet with my teachers and school principal whenever I did something wrong.
Attending my parents teachers conference and also was paying my fees and everyother thing related to my school.

I was very happy to have her.at least I had someone who genuinly loved me so much and will never leave me or forget I existed. She made the sixteen years of my life a memorable one and a happy one for me.

  I squealed in joy as I unboxed the phone joy my sister got me it was an iPhone 7+ one of the latest phones. I quirked my brows and looked at her giving her a questioning look. This was too much.

I know she worked but I didn't know where so.. her smile faded as she looked at the phone.

' you don't like it?' she asked confused

' yes I do! But how...?' I asked as she quickly understood what I was about to ask.

' Oh I work as the personal assistant of Polly corps' she said casually but I widened my eyes and screamed.

' what! How come you didn't tell me this' I asked suddenly, angry and happy at the same time.

' I'm sorry Fuza. I wanted it to be a surprise..so suprise!' she said showing of her perfectly pearly white teeth.

I folded my arms staring at her for five good minutes before I jumped on her hugging her so tightly.

' I love you joy, I'm so happy to have you'.i said with so much emotion

' I love you too Faouzia and I'm also very happy to have you' she replied. We stayed like that for minutes before we drew back from each other.

Just then mom came in and saw us together. I quickly hid the new phone joy got me and sat behind joy.

' what are you demons doing' mom asked in a groggy voice. Like she was wasted

' nothing' my sister joy replied her.
My mom just rolled her eyes and walked away.
I shivered behind my sister and breath relief when she left.

I've always been scared of mom and my sister has always been my protector. There's something dark about mom and is only waiting for a time to burst out. I just hoped the time never came.

🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

It was Saturday a day after my birthday. I woke feeling excited, happy I'll be spending time with joy today. I turned to my sister's side and found out that she wasn't on her bed.

Strange

I stood up from my bed going in search of her. But all her clothes were gone. I started to panic.
I went out of the room to the kitchen hoping this was just a joke and that she was preparing her special pancakes with strawberry and banana toppings but the kitchen was so empty.

My hands shook and reality hit me..

' I'm all alone..'

I ran back to my room shutting the door and locking it.
Getting under my sheets and sobbing, I cried so hard that I began to have an headache.
Suddenly I heard the front door close. 

Joy?
 
I quickly got out of the covers jumping out of my bed, unlocking my room door opening it to reveal my scary mom standing in front of me having a devilish grin plastered on her face.

' waiting for joy, are we?' Suddenly everything turned black.