Fae woke up to the feeling of sunlight against her face. It was warm on her, certainly something that one would find comforting, but as she stirred in bed, she was certain that something was off.
She kept his eyes half-lidded and her movements reserved, clinging onto the false hope that Sayako wasn't moving because she didn't want to wake her. But Fae knew that this wasn't the case. She just didn't want to accept it.
Stretching out a trembling arm, Fae took hold of Sayako's hand. She shut her eyes and squeezed her palm. It was cold. Her hand trembled harder with each passing second, as if the movement would cause Sayako to wake up. Fae's face buried into the crook of her neck. She nudged the bridge of her nose against the cool skin. Her lips brushed against the girl's collarbone in desperate search of that familiar warmth. Both hands had clasped around Sayako's own now, quavering without pause. She couldn't find a pulse.
Devastation weighed down on Fae in that instant. It was a surreal feeling, one that she could never in one million years describe. It squeezed her, threatening to crush her from the inside out. The pain seared itself into her soul, hindering her, rendering her speechless to a point where she no longer knew what words were.
A sob wretched its way out from Fae's throat.
She tried desperately to hold it in. Tried so hard to keep herself together, but she knew she was too weak to pull such a bluff. Once the second sob had left her, she felt herself spiraling. There was no hiding it. She was undone.
Her body jerked with each sob that was torn from her, her frame curling to bring herself closer. She held Her face against the corpse's neck, just beneath the jawline, breathing in all that was left of Sayako.
She had so many things she'd wanted to do with her, so many things she'd wanted to say, but all of those things seemed to have fallen away once the moment had finally come. Fae wanted to scream, but she couldn't find her voice. Not even a sentence could get past her suffering.
She kept herself against Sayako and held onto her with what little strength she had left in her. She didn't get up to alert the nurses, or the doctors, or anyone in the hospital. She knew that once they found out, they would take Sayako away from her.
So she stayed in place, holding onto Sayako, taking in her company for one last time before she'd never see her again.
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Once Fae had left the hospital, he never looked back.
She walked home that day with a balled up blanket in her arms, a burgundy scarf around her neck, and nothing more from the hospital. She held them against her frame in the twenty degree weather, and though many people gave her strange looks and watched her side-ways, none of this affected her in the slightest. The cold was no longer a factor to Fae. She couldn't feel it. Her mind wouldn't allow her to.
She made it home without so much as a hello to her lover who sat in the living room. They asked her questions. She answered blatantly. They asked about the blanket and the scarf, but they never asked about Sayako. They hadn't bother to visit her today, so they got to find out when everyone else did.
She ascended the steps to her room, balled her – no – Sayako's blanket up into a lump, and dropped it onto her bed along with the scarf. She reached into her pocket to fish out her phone, and pushed call on one of her contacts. She held it up to her ear and waited for the other line to pick up. Once it did, Fae was greeted with a, "Hello?" The familiar voice of reina answered.
"Sayako is dead. Meet me upstairs."
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"How did she look?" Reina asked with a hushed tone.
It took Fae a while to respond.
"When I woke up?"
"Yeah..." Reina looked down.
Fae let out a half-assed grunt and continued to stare forward.
"Pale. Sick. Dead."
"How did you find out that she wasn't... There anymore?"
"Her entire body was relaxed. Her head rested on mine with the weight of someone's who's unconscious."
This time, Reina was the one to grunt, the sound coming from deep within her chest. She was slow to speak up again, but did either way.
"Are you going to his funeral?"
"No."
The answer came so much more quickly than Reina thought it would. It shocked her as Fae continued.
"I refuse to go. My last memory of Sayako will not be of her sharply dressed, pale, stiff, and stuffed in a casket, surrounded by a countless amount of people who did not care for her at all until the day they heard about her death. My last memory of Sayo is already with me, and it will die along with me." She paused momentarily. "And you won't be going either. You weren't in the hospital when she died so your final memory of her was when she messaged us on her phone through the note app. And it is going to stay that way. Get one last look before I hide this."
Fae opened the notes app to show Reina one final time. The screen displays the message: 'One day we will get to be happy, I'll be able to speak and walk.. I'll be able to live.. Even if it's in another life...'
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