THE DOPPELGANGER

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Tul Pakorn Thanasrivanitchai is different from Joss and Earth. There is something about him that drew New in the first time they met. He is smart and sounds like it. His eyes smile even when his lips don't. And despite his obvious wealthiness, is down to earth.

Tay brought him up after one of their rare morning runs together. New had been reluctant to add another man to the list. But when Tay mentioned that they are family friends and have known each other since they were in diapers, he agreed to go on just one date.

One date became two, and two became three. After their third date, New was ready to let go of Joss and Earth and focus on just Tul. He told Gun who had gained an unhealthy interest in his dating chronicles.

"Tay looks even hotter in a suit," Gun comments when New shows him a photo of Tul.

He snatches the phone from his friend and looks at the photo again to make sure he hasn't mistakenly shown the wrong photo.

"This is not Tay."

Gun takes the phone again and holds the device unnecessarily close to his eyes. "Oh shit, this is not Tay. I thought it was him at the first glance."

"They don't even look alike, Gun. Nothing about them is alike."

"They are like identical unidentical twins."

"That is scientifically impossible."

"It means they could pass for identical twins but like not really."

New argued at length with Gun but after that, he started to see it too. That little scrunch of the nose when they smile. Their vast knowledge of everything on the surface of the earth. The slant of their eyes. Their passion for political issues. And even their haircut.

It confuses him to a remarkable degree that the one man he sees a future with amongst his plethora of choices bears some resemblance to Tay.

He doesn't let that discourage him. So Tul maybe looks a little like Tay, so what? It's not like Tay is bad to look that. It is the obverse. Tay is so good to look at that he has spent the past year and a month sleeping with him.

************************

New waxes on at length about Tul after their fourth date together. It was a private gallery viewing and ended with dinner on the roof with the view of the city beneath them. It was the fanciest date he had been on.

"He's so smart, Teh." New sings on. "He knows everything there is to know about art and architecture. He's just so great." New pauses to laugh when he recalls something Tul did. "Did I tell you he can burp out a tune?"

"You did, more than twice. Tul is awesome. I get it, can we watch the movie in silence now?"

"Who pissed in this one's coffee?" Tay's head is resting in his lap. New playfully tugs on his hair. "Fine, I'll be quiet."

The next morning, New googles Tay as he dresses in front of the wardrobe. When Tay wakes up in the morning for work, New wakes up too and falls back asleep only after he leaves. He is amused by Tay's battle with his necktie.

"I can see you laughing," Tay says to his reflection. "Just, please come help me."

He lifts himself from the bed and goes to Tay. "What are you gonna do when I'm not around, huh?" He undoes the ugly knot Tay made and fixes the tie with deftness. Tay doesn't respond. He looks up to find the man staring intently at him.

He smiles, "What?"

Tay shakes his head and looks down at New's hands on his tie. "It's—nothing. It's nothing."

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