Sunsets are indeed pretty.
For me, being able to see the sun setting is something you should be thankful for, why? Because it means that, you passed through the challenges that life threw on you and it also means that nighttime will come and you get to rest. You get to spend time with your family.
I hug myself as the wind brushes its way to my skin. I am sitting here on the seashore, where I can watch the sun setting itself to rest, while beside me, is the man who wants to go back to his home too.
"Let's end this Shiana," he said.
"What do you mean?" I asked, even tho I already know what he is tryin' to say.
"This relationship, Shiana. I'm not happy anymore" he looked at me.
"Why?? Just because you're not happy? Does your love for me can be measured by your happiness?"
"Ano bang nagawa ko, Kai?"
"Am I too tiring? Am I too clingy? Am I not good??" I said, my voice cracked as I threw him the last question.
"No," he said, not looking directly at me.
"Then, why??! Why Kai??!" as soon as I asked him why I broke down in my tears.
"It's still her, Shiana" he whispered not wanting me to hear his answer. Guess he's feeling guilty, huh.
"3 years with me and now you're telling me that it's still her?! 3 fucking years with me Kai! How? Why? Tatlong taon, Kaiden. Sa tatlong taon nasa'n ako?!" hindi ko malaman kung ano ba ang mga tamang salita. mga tamang tanong na kung saan ay hindi ako masasaktan sa sagot n'ya.
"I'm sorry" that's all he could say, damn him.
I continue to watch the sun go down while my tears keep on falling to my face, dripping onto the fine sands.
"If she's your happiness, I'll let you go love." I looked at him only to see him looking at me. I smiled, the genuine one.
Because he'll be happy and even if it means that I need to let him go.
"I hope you'll be happy with her."
He's not talking, he just looked at me with no expression. Sobrang hirap n'yang basahin.
"Can I leave first? I can't see you walking away from me, knowing that you're not coming back eh." And once again, I looked up to the sky, trying to prevent my tears from falling. Only to see the sky being gloomy, maybe because it's past six na din at mag gagabi na talaga.
I stand up from my seat and gave him one last look and mouthed "Goodbye" before I turned my back and started walking away from him.
While walking away from the man I love the most. I watched the sky as it turns out pink, and just like the sun that sinks, so as his love for me too."
Of all the goodbye's I received from many people who left me, you're my favorite.
Favorite Goodbye.
