A JOURNEY TO AUTRE MONDE

CHAPTER 3

After we went down from a hill, loud crashed of waves welcomed us. The cool breeze touched my skin and flew my hair and plain white long skirt away. I borrowed some clothes from Kley. I wore her white long sleeves and skirt, paired with white flip-flops.

Habang kumakain kami kanina ay nalaman kong anak pala ni Mama Formosa si Kley at mayroong asawa si Mama Formosa na nagngangalang Amour. Sabi ni Mama Formosa kanina ay tawagin ko na lang daw ang kaniyang asawa na Papa Amour.

The sparkling water made from the reflection of the sun was very fantastic to watch. This place could reach my highest standard of a comfort place. Both endless greeny hills on the side and seawater from the other was a very rare scenery for me. I was startled when Kley suddenly dragged me near the water. The water splashed on our feet that made us giggled at each other.

"D'yan ka namin nakita," I heard Vero who was approaching us with Riche. Mama Formosa was just sitting on a picnic cloth that was layed on the sand. I returned my gaze at my feet that was splashed by the water coming back and forth. My smile slowly faded.

I mocked inside my head when I realized that I was always afraid. I was afraid of my past, present, and future that made me confused on how to live my life. Suddenly, the urge of going back slowly decreased. I needed to pause. Maybe, this was the opportunity given for me. My deep thoughts just stopped when Mama Formosa bidded a goodbye.

"Mauuna na muna ako sa inyo. Magluluto pa ako ng hapunan natin," sabi niya. The three teens agreed. I turned at them and asked for a favor.

"Can I be alone for a while?"

"What do you mean?" Riche asked me back.

"Can you go back with Mama Formosa?" I could see that he wanted to argue but Mama Formosa's words stopped him.

"Maybe, she needs it right now. The three of you should go back with me." A hand held my pulse. Lumingon ako kay Kley.

"Will you go back?" she asked. I putted my hand on her shoulder and assured a smile.

"I'll be home. Wait for me," I said. She nodded and let go of my hand. She went towards Mama Formosa. Before they started going up, they looked at me and waved. I waved back and smiled.

Nang hindi na sila mahagilap ng aking paningin ay lumingon ako sa kabilang direksyon kung saan makikita ang tubig alat at papalubog na araw. I moved a little bit, so that the water wouldn't reach me. I sat on the sand and enjoyed the solitude.

I was very exhausted to live but I was also afraid of death. I was very tired to feel pain over and over again but I was afraid to give up life because what if, the rewards I deserved were in the future. I wanted to let myself feel happiness genuinely. May mga sandaling mararamdaman ko ang pagiging tao ngunit hindi ko alam kung tao pa ba ako. And that made my healing a main goal.

"Psst."

That moment was being distracted by that sound.

"Psst."

I roamed around but I didn't saw anyone. Bigla akong natakot. Mag-isa pa naman ako.

"Pss---"

"Aaaaahhhhh!" I shouted out of fear. Tatayo sana ako ngunit natumba ako. Dali-dali akong gumapang paatras at maiiyak na sana sa takot nang magsalita ang isdang nasa harap ko. Wait, parang pamilyar siya. Para siyang goldfish na kasing laki ng aking braso. Bigla kong naalala ang goldfish na nakita ko sa tubig bago ako mawalan ng malay noong naaksidente kami.

"Huwag kang matakot," sabi pa nito.

"Eh, sino bang hindi matatakot sa isdang nagsasalita?" Natawa naman ito sa sinabi ko.

"I'm Goldie," pagpapakilala nito.

"And I'm here to answer your questions," pagpapatuloy niya. I was stunned.

I came back to my senses and went back to my direction just a while ago. Hope was rising all over through my system.

"Isn't this a place for me?" I asked.

"What? I don't understand," sagot nito. Hays.

"Then, just tell me everything you know," I concluded.

"First, you need to know this place. This is an almost perfect place---" Sumingit ako ng tanong.

"Why isn't it perfect? Why is it just almost?"

"Perfect is just a word to exaggerate things. But there's no perfect, it's just a mere illusion," Goldie answered. I nodded slowly when I got the point and let him continue.

"The people here are divided by their goodness. There are classes from one to four. Class One, the people with highest goodness of their heart while Class Four is the opposite. Good people are highly respected."

"What about those in Class Four?" I asked again out of curiosity.

"They will be given a chance but if they will show how they're not deserving for it, then... death." I got goosebumps hearing the last word.

"W-Why?" I stuttered and asked out of nowhere.

"To lessen the evilness in this world." And again, I nodded slowly. Even if this world was like that, I'd still didn't feel safe after hearing those words.

"How can I get out of here?" I asked, trembling inside.

"This world is for goodness," sagot nito.

"So, I can't get out of here?" I asked again.

"No. You need to learn the essence of being good. The true essence of goodness," he stated.

"Am I not good enough?" I asked, feeling a little bit offended. Goldie didn't answer my question, instead, he swam back to the water and disappeared.

As the sun was setting down, I was also reminiscing my past deeds. I remembered how I swallowed my opinion just to avoid wars and judgements. I didn't intend to share explanations for my side even if they were accusing me. I always said yes to everything they told me. I did what other people needed and wanted. I helped. How could it still be not enough?

You need to learn the essence of being good. The true essence of goodness.

Naalala ko ulit ang sinabi ni Goldie sa akin kanina. I nodded while zoning out.

Learn.