"Sometimes, I just don't know," she said, watching the drops trickle down the window while the shine of those trickles reflected back into her eyes, making it seemed like they twinkled, like there was something actually there, rather than blotchy gray granite.
I stared at her, and she didn't notice because she was marveling at those clear dots that were falling from the sky. I ran a hand through my hair. Everything seemed gray, it usually is when it's raining, I know that, but everything seemed actually gray. Maybe it was just because of the sweater she was wearing, and the way she was curled up by the window motionless with a blanket covering the lower half of her body. She looked disheveled, faded hair tied up into a messy knot on her head, meant to keep it out of her face but strands always managed to get loose and fall on her pale marble flesh. She seemed lost, and not lost like the other times before, but really lost, as if she were trying to find something in those rain drops, as if she were waiting for them to show her something, something.
And sometimes I don't know if the trickles down my skin form and come back together, because I am never there to see them do it. I have never witnessed it but somewhere in this whole entanglement of silver thread and rain drops, I can see--
Stop.
"Have you ever wanted to run away, even if there's nothing to run away from?" she asked herself more than she was to me. She was still gazing out the window without a wisp of emotion in her features.
I closed my eyes, and took in a deep breath, feeling my warmth escape me and tickle the hairs on my arms.
"Yes," I answered, still with my eyes closed. I didn't need to open them to know that she was looking at me now. I waited until I felt her stare stop grazing my skin, but it never left so I had to open them.
I let my eyelids crackle, just so I could see the blurry outline of her figure. The picture seemed watered down with two gray blotches standing out in particular. Two gray twinkling blotches, but not because of the reflection from the water droplets, but because of the understanding that was there-- the wholeness that was there.
I shut my eyes again, and listened to the sound of those droplets pitter patter, catching the sound of paper crinkling. It was the sides of my eyes, they were crinkling, along with the corners of my mouth that were being folded into a smile. I felt her smile back with those gray blotches of her showing more warmth than there ever has been. She turned back to her window, and we fell back into the tune of those water droplets pitter pattering.
