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𝐈t has already been two days since Illyan was put in a medical coma, and Soleil was already going crazy.
She knew that the doctors said he'll wake up between tomorrow and next week. But she hoped that he did today.
She missed him.
Even though, she was with him in the hospital room it wasn't the same. He wasn't responsive, he didn't talk to her, he didn't held her, he didn't comfort her—and that was what Soleil needed the most at the moment.
Comfort.
She just needed for her lover to comfort her like he usually did. Illyan was the only one who could get her to calm down because he was always so positive—which she was not.
She always thought about the worse and never the good. Because to her thinking about the good was unreal. It wasn't something that she was used to, and thinking that everything will be fine felt wrong.
Because at the moment, everything was not fine and probably will never be.
She was alone most of the times, because Peezy and Lontrell were desperately trying to find who shot Illyan. But without the first witness/ victim being up—or responsive, it was almost impossible.
Her father of course had other priorities, but always made sure to call and check on her. He brung her clothes and food, and made sure she was okay, and didn't do anything stupid like she did the last time.
Soleil also started experiencing nightmares from that night, just the sight of Illyan bleeding out on the cold floor made her wanna cry.
She couldn't help but to revive the traumatic event every night, in what was supposed to be a break from reality.
She had to wake up alone every time she had a nightmare, and seeing Illyan's irresponsive body on the hospital bed every time she opened her eyes didn't help. It reminded her of what happened for him to end up here.
She would and never could forget, how he basically bled out in her arms. How she was covered in his blood. How he almost died in her sight. But most importantly how she almost gave up on him that night.
Soleil would never forgive herself for loosing faith in him, and his capability of getting through this.
She felt sick to her stomach knowing that she gave up on him for a quick minute, knowing that he'll never give up on her. That'll destroy him, and she knew that.
" I'm sorry" she held his hand as tears rolled down her cheeks. " I'm sorry I didn't come sooner" she sniffed, rubbing the back of his hand.
Soleil was also starting to blame herself, she thought that if maybe she didn't take that long to find him, the situation wouldn't have been this bad.
