TW: mentions of d3ath !!
"hange." said the dark haired man, "what are you doing up at this hour?"
surprised by the sudden appearance of the man, the messy haired person stood up and smiled.
"i guess i couldn't sleep because of our mission tomorrow. considering the high possibility of me dy-" the man stopped them mid-sentence asking them to stop talking. looks like he was bothered by it too.
"so, levi. what are YOU doing up at this hour?" said hange with a smile on their face, trying to mimic levi.
"nightmares."
he never changed his answer. only one word, every night. this time, hange had enough courage to ask him what they're about.
"sooooo leviiii" hange said in a voice that annoyed levi most of the time, "what are your nightmares about? I'd really like to know since they keep you up so much. maybe talking about it will help?" they said as they sat back down.
"why would I tell you?" that's the only thing he thought of because their words immediately left the man in shock. his face froze at their words, considering no one asked him this before. they always turned away awkwardly or they'd mumble the two words levi hated the most, "I'm sorry".
he hated when people apologized if they're not responsible or when they'd pity him like he was some weak kid.
truth is, deep inside, he did feel like a weak kid.
he wasn't very good at showing emotion but he was very emotional.
as for hange, they were always open about their emotions. or at least that's what people think. they showed just enough emotion for people to not suspect it, just enough to make it look like they're just some cheery crazy scientist who absolutely adores titans.
in reality they're more that that.
they become easily anxious and shake a lot when they think about certain topics, like future plans and missions for example.
they hated the idea of infinity and absolutely despised when people used the word "forever" in a way that shows their love for them, like moblit used to say.
"hange, I'll love you forever. i promise." he used to say that a lot.
"you broke your promise, moblit." hange mumbled
levi suddenly turned around when he heard hange's soft cry.
tears were slowly dropping on the coffee table but hange still had a smile on their face.
that made levi wonder how and why are they still trying to look happy when they're obviously not.
"why."
"huh? what do you mean why, levi?"
"why are you still pretending."
the scientist's eyes widened at his words
"you can't keep pretending forever. tomorrow morning we're leaving and it might be our last mission together but you're still acting like it's nothing. i know you're not okay so why are you still pretending?"
hange let out a little laugh before turning to levi with tears in their eyes
"there's no doubt I'll die tomorrow. it's a well known fact, so there's no point in trying to stop it by being sad. after all my time has come."
"hange you don't have to do this i-" this time he was the one being stopped mid-sentence by the scientist who got out of their chair and walked up to the man.
"i do, levi. I'm doing it for erwin, for moblit, for you, for humanity. you have to let me do this."
"erwin..." levi sounded like he ran out of breath. they're right. erwin would be proud. after all, they're doing a good thing for humanity.
"hange." the man said while placing his fist on the left side of their chest
"dedicate...your heart." a couple tears formed in his eyes but he quickly wiped them off with his sleeve.
"LEVI!! that's the first time I ever heard you say this!!! and thank you. i will."
hange was disturbed and happy at the same time. hearing him say those words sparked a new emotion in them, it made them worry.
"tch." levi turned around in hopes that he'll hide the worried look on his face.
"levi?" hange said in a happy-ish voice,
"when i die"
"hm?" levi turned back and faced them once again, curiosity and worry on his face were clearly showing.
"when i die, I'll probably see erwin, right? so do you have any special requests or something you want me to tell him?"
this time hange was actually smiling. but seeing levi's facial expression changed from worried to sad in a matter of seconds made them feel bad for asking.
"tell him that-" he stopped talking.
"nevermind. it's stupid anyway."
the scientist, now more curious than ever, asked again.
"what do you want me to tell him, levi? it's not stupid. i promise."
"tell him that I'm sorry. tell him that i know it's my fault for not using the injection on him and tell him that id do anything just to see him again. it should've been me. i miss him. i did love him after all"
hange froze. they expect a "why did you die, idiot." or "you left me with this annoying titan lover, I'll never forgive you for that" but not something this honest.
"levi, i give you my word that he'll get this message." they said with a smile
the blue-eyed man let out a small laugh before getting his cup of tea and offering one to hange. they gladly accepted it and with that, they spent the rest of the night talking about their past, their memories together.
they were both really grateful for each other. they both knew they couldn't ask for a better friend than this.
even tho one of them barely showed emotion and always acted mean and looked annoyed, the other one knew that it was because he cared. they remembered some small moments in which their friend showed concern about them and it made them really happy.
they both shared this night in the best way possible, talking to each other. it was comforting and it brought them both closure. the one thing they both needed.
they were talking for hours completely forgetting that tomorrow, this all ends. forever.
their friendship, as they know it will only exist in levi's head and his stories. he did have a lot of them after all.
neither one of them was ready for tomorrow.
levi wasn't ready to lose the only person he has left, the person who stuck by his side, his best friend.
hange wasn't ready to lose him either. they loved him, they really did.
they also weren't ready to die. so many things they haven't experienced yet, so many titans they haven't seen, so many people, so many feelings.
but this way, at least they'll be closer to moblit, the person they loved in a different way, and erwin, their dear friend taken away from them too soon.
both levi and hange fell asleep in their chairs, which is surprising considering levi has a lot of trouble sleeping. this time, he felt at peace. he felt closure. same goes for his messy-haired friend.
if only it could stay like this forever
