"I can't believe Denki is good at something," Ashido said, frowning as she watched Denki scrape bills and coins across the low table with a glint in his eye and a grin.
"It's his face," Sero said, sliding a suspicious look beside him. "It gives away nothing because there's never anything going on in there."
"You say that," Denki said, cackling with drunken revelry as he spilled the money onto his lap in flagrant disregard for the fact that half of it would eventually end up beneath Katsuki's couch by the end of the night. "But you're all just bitter I just pounded your asses."
"No one would let you near their ass," Sero said, scrunching his face as he collected the cards and shuffled them with quick, practiced hands.
Ashido swigged from her beer and cracked it on the table, her lips and tongue smacking in distaste like she'd downed a particularly strong shot.
"Fuck. Why would you go there, Sero? My brain eyes!"
"That's call your imagination, dumbass," Katsuki said dully, finishing off his - ninth? - beer of the night. He had a good buzz going, his limbs heavy and loose, his nerves at bay and ease.
"I like brain eyes," Kirishima said from beside Katsuki with a bright grin.
"You would," Katsuki said with an eye roll.
"Speaking of ass pounding, though," Ashido said with glee and glimmering black gaze. She folded her arms upon the table and rested her ample chest upon them, her tits nearly hitting her in the chin.
Katsuki wondered if people found that attractive or whatever. They had to get in the way during sex, like all over the pl-
"How're things with you and Midoriya? You guys switch yet?"
"Haaah?" Katsuki whirled on Ashido, his face already red. "The fuck does that mean? No, tell me and I'll kill you. What the hell is wrong with you?"
Ashido snorted, sliding a grin toward Denki's snicker as she leaned back on her hands, delighting in the round of muffled chuckles encircling the table.
"You don't deserve all those fangirls, y'know," Sero said with a hefty sigh as he got to his feet and wandered toward the kitchen. "At first we all just thought you were just obsessed with battle and didn't have time for dating. Boy, were we off the mark."
"Literally, boys," Kirishima said from Katsuki's shoulder.
"The fuck's that supposed to mean?" Katsuki snarled, folding his arms and swaying in place as the beers threatened to topple him to the side. "That's their fault. High school girls are terrifying."
"That's probably the only thing you're scared of," Ashido said, her smile delighted.
"Who isn't?" Katsuki said with a tsch.
"Me!" Denki said, raising his hand with such force that the idiot keeled right over. This was why Katsuki was staying still.
"You're not fearless," Ashido said blandly. "You're just clueless."
"You love me, though."
"Only me," Ashido said. "Literally. You only have me."
"She's not wrong," Katsuki said with a shrug, looking up when Sero pressed another cold one to his ear. He accepted the open bottle with a nod and took a swig.
"I still love you, Denki," Kirishima said, laughing as Denki's face fell.
"Yeah, but you don't have boobs."
"Kiri has the biggest tits of anyone in this room," Ashido said, giggling as Kirishima performed his notable trick of making his pecs dance up and down. "See!"
