Dark Humor Volume 1

IEpisode 2

Ok. So I didn't exactly kill Malcolm Onkey. Well......

He lives on Honkey lane in a black neighborhood. (He's white). So I stepped in his house- wait I have to back up and tell you why I'm killing him.

He is so weird. I think he's either schizophrenic or autistic. Either way he's loony and the voices either tell him what to do or he has imaginary friends tell him what to do. I should know I live with an autistic and a schizophrenic. Also he said my glasses are so big I may as well give them to my fat mom to use.

So there you have it he's loony and mean.

Anyways back to the story. I walked into his house turns out it was not his house. It was Robber Rue.  My  "friend" thats on my kill list.

"Hello Noel, Its nice to see you." he said

"Hi Robber." I say "Where's Malcolm?"

"He is on vacation in fantasy world." he said "Anyway who cares about that loon."

Exactly I thought Who cares about that loon.

"I bring bad news for him." I said.

"What kind of bad news."

"Someone died."

"Who?"

"Youll know soon." I changed the topic. "How can you live with him."

"Needed money, his doctor pays me a thousand dollars a week to keep him out of his office or hospital."

"Who's his doctor?" I asked.

"Kris Singer."

"That's another on my list."

"What list?"

I needed to think for a moment "My friend list."

"But Kris hates you."

"That's exactly why he's on my list."

"What list?"

"My hate list." technically I wasn't lying.

Then I when I got home I fell to the floor.

Something stabbed me. I looked up it was Malcolm Onkey "Why did you do that?" I said crying

"You said you needed a knife last week."