Have you ever felt like the world just doesn't care about you?
Not hate you or anything but rather you're just a speck.
Like not even your own mum err dad really cares.
It's like a knife in your chest,
I'm so worthless people don't even bother noticing me.
I let out an angry snort aimed at the ceiling. I always think stupid thoughts like this when I'm alone, which is always I suppose. Hugging my arms around myself inside my dull empty room a few tears rolled down my cheeks. People like me who've been through considerable emotional pain are supposed to be strong like a rock err something right? Yet I just seem to cry whenever I'm alone because all the thoughts just love to pour back.
Buzzing burst from my tiny flip phone beside me. I slapped my hand around it annoyed, and confused why someone was texting me so bloody early in the morning.
Eyy mate! Wanna go down to the pub? -JL
I rubbed my forehead now sitting on the edge of my bed legs dangling off it trying to remember who the guy was who was texting me. I shrugged, probably a guy I met out with some other people I didn't really know.
Sounds good but ain't it sorta late? -NM
Not at all! Its lik a rly fun joint! The bouncers r super loose n stuff too! -JL
A loose party kind of meant drugs didn't it? The last one I went to was filled with a bunch of people half of them high and the other half drunk off their asses. I needed to get out though, just going from work and home probably isn't good for me...
Count me in! where it at? Or cn u pik me up? -NM
Ill pick ya up! 20 min k? oh address too love! -JL
I quick gave him the address to my apartment building being sure not to give him the actual flat number. I hurried throwing some makeup on along with some clothes good for clubs. Well good in my opinion, I'm not exactly fashionable...
I pulled out of the dark trail my mind always headed in; tonight I just need to get drunk or at least stop getting stuck in my head. Hurrying out of my flat and down the complexes stairs I stood outside of the doors, making sure I was visible from the street. I stood for around for about five minutes before I saw a unfamiliar car pull up in front of me. The window rolled down to reveal a face that I actually recognized, his name was Jeff and I'd met him at some party a distant friend had. He gave a wave and a hello before I did a quick smile as I hopped into his car, which was pretty nice actually.
We got to the club awhile later, we chatted a bit but most of it was a little awkward. When we pulled up I noticed a group of boys most of them tall , except for a blond tipped one who was a bit short, but taller than me. They sort of stood out because they stayed close together and wore long black trench coats. Jeff tapped my shoulder whipping me from my observations of the group of boys He said he was going to go find his group of friends after we got inside, he also mentioned I could go talk to some people while I was waiting.
Fat chance.
Remember the whole "I'm a nobody" thing?
Well that doesn't just turn off in clubs.
I replied with a cheery "Kay" before he walked off in search of them. I decided I could at least sit at the bar and get a drink, I think a lot less buzzed. I spotted one of the boys I saw from before ,lacking coats though, I spoted the shorter blonde one so I could at least identify them still. I examined each of their faces
Each of them were really different, so obviously not brothers.
The short one was cute, sort of fluffy looking, bright blond hair with natural brown hair peeking out beneath it. Another was tall, the tallest out of all of them, with big hands and dipples showing as he laughed along with another in the group. His fluffy curls shook as he laughed at the shorter, although older looking, guy's joke I presumed. The older looking boy continued to make the curly haired brunette laugh continually; he had a sort of quiff in his hair which looked cute on him. I finally got around to the last two, a tall buff one with buzzed hair and another who sort if looked fluffy...some reason i found that incredibly cute. His dusky brown eyes were focused in buzz cut who seemed to be planning something. I hadn't realized it but the fluffy one started to stare back at me.
I instantly whipped my head down completely embarrassed. When I finally gathered the courage to look up he was standing right next to my spot at the bar,
"Hello , I figured introducing myself would be proper by now..." He said flashing a perfect smile at me. "I'm Zayn , love"
