ENHYPEN | au collection

2. LIFETIME

Was there a lifetime waiting for us in a world where I was yours?

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"Hey, Pox!" bungad ni Jake nang sagutin ko ang tawag niya.

I've always been told that my eyes looked like the eyes of a fox, gaining me the nickname pox. It all started in him. He loved calling me that, and little did we know, everyone has already used it to address me.

A small smile appeared on my lips. I missed him calling me by that byname. I missed him. 

Kailan ba kami huling nagkausap? Mula kasi nang lumipat kami sa Japan dahil sa trabaho ni Dad ay hindi na kami madalas na magkausap.

Naging busy ako sa school at ganoon din siya. Hindi nagkakatugma ang schedule namin kaya kung nung una'y tumatawag pa kami sa isa't-isa tatlong beses sa isang linggo, noong tumagal ay isang beses na lang sa isang buwan.

At ngayon nga ay halos anim na buwan na siguro mula nung huli naming tawag. He called first this time. How unusual thou, he rarely initiate the call and just wait for me to do it first. He's lazy like that. 

I was really holding myself back. I stopped myself from calling him because I planned to surpise him next week. Uuwi ako at sasabihin ko na sakaniya ang lahat. 

Bahala na kung anong kalalabasan. Pain or gain. Be it. I'm tired. Pagod na akong magtago. Nakakapagod pilitin ang sarili ko na hindi siya gustuhin.

Gusto ko siya. No, mahal ko siya.

"Hey, GB!" I greeted back. 

"No! Not that nickname again!" reklamo niya.

I laughed when I heard him whine. "Bakit? Hindi ka na ba good boy?"

"Never was," he replied, voice too serious for me to deem as a joke.

What does he mean by that?

"Naku, Jake, we all know you are. By the way, napatawag ka? Antagal na nating 'di nagkakausap! Namiss mo ba ako?" I joked to lighten the mood.

"Miss kita," sabi niya.

I felt my heart skip a beat. Fuck. Here we go again. This guy, the little things he do, the simple words he says, and his erratic effects on me. Damn it. Kalma, Sunoo. Si Jake lang yan! 

"Pero alam kong mas miss mo 'ko," tukso niya na sinundan ng malakas na tawa.

I was about to talk again when I heard a voice from his line. It wasn't his. Not Jake's voice. Who is it?

I couldn't help but get curious. I had the strong urge to ask, but I held it in.

I didn't want to overthink, but the way they exchanged words was too intimate, I doubt they're just friends.

No, Sunoo. Don't go there yet.

But what if my hunch is right? What if that guy is someone special to him? What will I do? 

"Sorry about that. So yeah, I called to tell you something," he said the moment he was done talking to the guy with him.

I hummed. "You sound so serious. You're making me nervous."

He snickered, "Baliw! Sasabihin ko lang na may boyfriend na ako! Yun yung guy kanina. Sunghoon ang name niya..."

I failed to hear all the words that followed. My ears refused to listen, my mind refused to take it in.

Boyfriend? Kailan pa?

I mustered the courage left in me and said, "T-totoo? Seryoso?"

Shit. I stuttered.