Taking a Chance

Chapter 33

Even once she calmed down he kept rocking her gently. "I'm so happy you told me Kyree, but I really wish you would have told me right when they happened instead of acting out," Sean said softly. "Can you tell me why you couldn't just come tell me?"

"I thought you wouldn't believe me," She said softly.

"I'm so sorry you thought that Pookie," he sighed, "I will always believe you just like the rest of the guys will. You can always tell us anything and we will believe you, okay?"

"I will try," She whispered. "I'm sorry I kicked North and misbehaved."

"Thank you," Sean said as he ran his fingers through her hair, "you can go apologize to North and the rest of them later but right now I really need to switch to doctor mode and I need you to be completely honest with me so we can get this all fixed okay?" She started to shake and he held her. "I promise North won't finish the spankings and Max will be back in your room tonight okay?" She nodded as she clung to him. "Are you having bad thoughts right now?" She nodded and burst into tears again.

The team rushed in and Sean passed her to North. "I'm so sorry North I'm sorry," She burst into tears as she clung to him.
"Thank you Baby. We're okay Baby," He said as he hugged her tightly.

She saw Luke through her tears and reached out for him. He took her and hugged her tightly, "I'm so sorry Luke," She sobbed and he kissed the top of her head.

"I know Cupcake, thank you, it's okay, we're okay," He whispered softly.

"I'm sorry I was a brat to you Marc," She sobbed as she clung to him.

"Thank you. We are okay Beautiful," He said as he hugged her.

She went and hugged and apologized to everyone.

Once she reached Raven he hugged her then mumbled, "Stupid South spank beautiful ass not me not fair." She burst out laughing then pouted. "I get next time it be fun." She looked at him confused and he laughed then kissed her forehead.

She went back to Sean and crawled into his lap. "Oh Pookie, I can't be in doctor mode when you wants cuddles too."

"Doctor later, cuddles now," She mumbled. "Cuddles make bad voices go away."

"How about we take turns cuddling you while you talk to Doc then once Doc is done he can cuddle you again?" Kota asked and she looked down.

"You will get mad at the thoughts," She whispered.

"We won't get mad at you Darling, we know it's the medicine," Owen said kneeling in front of her. "We promise you won't be in trouble with what the bad thoughts told you." She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck. He picked her up and sat beside Sean with her in his lap.

"Ok Kyree," Sean said switching over to doctor mode. He grabbed a notebook and pen so he could take notes about what she told him. "When did the bad thoughts start?"

"A week after I started taking them," She said looking at her hands.

"Would that be the reason for some of your mood swings you've been having?" Sean asked and saw out of the corner of his eye Gabe start to say something but Luke put his hand over his mouth.

"It's hard to ignore them," She mumbled. "At first I thought they were from me recovering from David but I still had them even after the nightmares stopped. They got stronger the longer I kept taking them. I thought if I didn't take them then they would stop."

"Tell me about the voices," Sean commanded in the tone that she knew better than to not listen.

She took a deep breath and Owen wrapped his arms around her stomach. She leaned back into him and closed her eyes. She couldn't bear to see the disappointment on their faces. "It started off small like making me question what Gabriel set out for me to wear like if it would upset anyone else that I was wearing North's shirt and Marc's hoodie I was hurting everyone else's feelings. I was playing favorites by cuddling with Corey and not Nathan. Then it started to get worse like I was stupid for not being able to make my own decisions on what I wanted to eat or that I couldn't pick out my own clothes. I was pathetic for going into little mode and I was a slut for loving all of you. Then the images started."

"What do you mean images?" She heard Sean ask.

She felt herself being moved and from the way she was being held she could tell it was North holding her. The shaking made her think he was getting to worked up so Owen had him hold her to try and calm down. Knowing the men she had a feeling Raven was probably just as close to losing it as North. She wouldn't be surprised if Raven was the next one to hold her.

"It was just thoughts at first but then one time Nathan came into my room and told me that Marc was making lunch and I might want to just make something to eat myself because he was pretty sure there were tomatoes in the sub sandwiches he was making then Nathan left. I was confused because I knew Marc always makes sure to not put tomatoes on my sandwich and then my phone went off from with a text from Nathan telling him he placed first in the tournament and would be home soon to show me his new medal and I needed to find a place for it for him. I went to his room then checked the driveway and sure enough Nathan's car was gone so I just wondered if I imagined the whole thing. I have had images of everyone at one time or another messing with me."

"So you have seen and heard all of us telling you bad things?" Sean asked and she nodded.

She felt herself being moved again and sure enough Raven covered her. She turned and faced him. She wrapped her legs around his back and hid her face in his neck.

"I didn't realize it until now but the fake you never touched me. The fake you always stood beside or in front or across the room but I never got cuddles from them. I later realized if I was seeing one of the fake ones and one of you would come in and give me a hug or come cuddle then the fake would disappear. So I became more clingy but I didn't think you seemed to mind. I thought I was dealing with the fake Marc giving me the medicine but now I know it wasn't. I just wanted to get away so I could try and figure it out. They were starting to put ideas in my head that the only way I was going to get rid of them was to hurt myself and I was getting scared that it might be true."