Jeno Lee is an inexplicable personification of a question mark.
His eyes disappear and form crescent moons when he smiles. His laugh booms when I whine about him not paying attention to me. He whispers to himself when he sleeps. He keeps getting lost in his thoughts and he has almost no control over time.
He is also very, very handsome.
But the point is, he doesn't make sense at all. He is too wrapped in his thoughts and I'm just an outsider. (okay diary be ready for the most dramatic trauma dump ever haha)
Once an outsider, always an outsider right? It's not as if my mother ever held me, hugged me, ruffled my hair or listened to me. But let's leave that in the past now, in a dusty musty old shelf where I won't bother looking ever again.
Today was a spectacular day and I won't let the past stomp on my parade.
After a week of staying at the hotel, we got bored and decided to check out and head onto Kwangyin by taking a squeaky jolting bus with a jovial bus driver who would hoot every time we reached a stop.
"Hoot! Hoot!" He said for the fourth time as we arrived at our destination.
Kwangyin was a picturesque and peaceful valley bombarded with pink tulips and a multitude of tiny flowers who wouldn't whisper their names to me along with a stream running down the area. The sky was crystal clear as we arrived, the sun warmly welcoming us with a radiant smile.
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Jeno might appear strong but he is quite gentle in his mannerisms. He'd tread around the field meticulously making sure to not hurt a flower in sight. He'd wave his arms at me and show me how to move on forward always lending me a hand to walk in his path.
Jeno and I had a funny dynamic. We never once asked each other why we ran away, have no nicknames, our conversations are usually quite bubbly even though we both know that there is a storm stirring in us.
It's almost as if we're in a utopia oblivious to the ruins around us. We shy away from our curiosity to maintain a tranquil relationship only filled with sunny skies.
Alas, we are on the wrong path as Rule No. 1 of living life is to be vulnerable so that you can find love and trust in people.
But it's okay, I reassure myself, silence needs to meddle sometimes for us to grow. Especially a silence like this, filled with ease.
"NA- NA LOOK AT THIS", he points at the fish, who are bubbling to and fro around the stream. "Wait Nana is actually a lovely nickname, is it okay if I call you that?"
"Sure but then I need to give you a nickname too...hmm how about Nojam?" I wink in his direction as I wait for him to attack me.
"HEY!"
He chased after me and we ran with the wind, our youth delightfully prancing with us. As we catch our breath and lay down on the ground we turn towards each other and just take in each other's features. We tend to do that a lot, I realized. "So..." I break the silence.
"So." he replies
"Have you heard about the story of Icarus?" I ask suddenly.
"Sort of, his dad made wings and didn't pay attention to his advice so he fell to his death right?"
"Well, that is part of it yes. Icarus's father, Daedalus, created artificial wings made of wax to escape. Daedalus had warned Icarus to not fly too high or the sun will melt his wings. But once, he started flying Icarus seem to have forgotten to pay heed to anything his dad said as he flew up and freely, and he let himself feel immortal at that moment and forget his shortcomings. He flew up and up and up and he ignored his dad's shouts. But he's only human and so his wax melted and he fell into the pits of the ocean."
"That's sad"
" Mhm, It is said that before falling Icarus had discovered the secrets of the universe...his curiosity quenched and his being complete. I wonder why the birds don't fly that high, I wonder why they don't try disappearing into the sun."
"Maybe it's cause they're born with wings. Flying isn't freedom to them, it's a way of life."
"What would you do if you could fly?"
"Hm?"
"If you could fly, would you lose your mind like Icarus or would you be level headed like the birds?"
"Well, I can't fly so what's the point of thinking about it?"
"Just imagine bro"
" You're so weird"
"And you aren't?"
"Shush let's enjoy the breeze now"
Laying on his stomach, I felt the world at peace as I watched the clouds lethargically pass by.
P.S. I hate that falling feels like flying till the bone crush.
...
A/N: enjoy them being cute cause the drama is incoming😏
