Someone to Stay

thirteen

I'm sorry this took so long! enjoy, xx.
_

Her house is a mess, but it was the good kind. Boxes were stacked up, one on top of the other. She wiped each item free from dust before she placed them inside the color-coordinated boxes—as if it wouldn't collect dust once it was stored and out of sight. When the last of Stephen's books were put away neatly, Carmen let out a loud sigh that told of both relief and exhaustion.

The day had finally come; she was moving out of her house.

She's called this her home for a little over seventeen years, and it was surely going to be an adjustment to live away from these walls. She loved this house, every inch of it; it was the house she dreamed of when she was a little girl. And for some time, it was accompanied by the life she had always imagined.

But, that lifetime was over—as Amelia would have pointed out—and it was time to move on.

That couldn't be done in this house, no matter how hard she tried. And so, leaving was the best decision. Not that she was doing it in an attempt to forget about Stephen and Gab, but she knew she had to do this to move forward. They would have wanted just as much.

And thankfully, this time, she was ready.

"Babe, can you help me bring these down?" She called out, wanting this to be over with so she could shower and turn in for the day—or before that, maybe get some takeout and eat on her (new) living room floor.

Raine came through the door, "ha? Babe ka diyan!" She rolled her eyes, pretending to be annoyed with Carmen. "Willing naman akong tumulong, di mo ako kailangang tawaging babe. Ganyan ba epekto pag walang lumalambing? Kahit sino nalang babe tawag mo?"

The peds surgeon pinched her arm, not wanting to engage in that conversation. Carmen smiled tightly and turned away from her best friend, not wanting her to see the distraught look on her face upon the reminder of the (dare she say it) past ka-lambingan.

But Raine Valentina wasn't going to let up. She knew it pained Carmen to be away from him, and frankly, was confused as to why she wasn't doing anything about it, "wala pa rin siyang paramdam?" Rai asked. Carmen heaved a deep sigh, her shoulders rising and falling at the depth of her breath.

The best friend was quick to the rescue, enveloping her in a hug from behind, "I'm sorry."

Maybe she shouldn't have prodded. "Sige na nga, pwede mo na akong tawaging babe." She tried to console Carmen, resting her chin on the other's shoulder.

They stayed like that for a while, Carmen keeping mum while Raine offered her support in the form of physical touch.

"I'll bring one of these down. Sunod ka na after, ah? Gutom na 'ko." Raine said, breaking the silence.

Carmen nodded but stayed still, leaning on the vanity table as she spiraled into her thoughts. There was no use crying about this, but her tears fell nonetheless.

Three months. It has been three months since the last time she saw him.

Despite the pain she was feeling, she couldn't blame Ariel for it. His grief was insurmountable, and perhaps staying away from her was the only way he knew to move forward. She didn't know his reasons or how he managed to leave her despite reminding her time and again of how much he loves her—loves, loved? She wasn't sure.

But even on that, she couldn't fault him. Not when she's run away from him one too many times, too. And, if Amelia weren't sick, she would have been the first to leave and pull away from him.

How could she hold a grudge when she had the same intentions months ago? How could she hold a grudge when this was the one time he chose himself over her?