The Sunset Is Beautiful (bxb)

part 2 : "Where your touch lingers"

That day was no different from any other. I woke up at the usual 6am, did my usual skin-care routine and styled my hair the same way as usual. Then I went to my room and picked one of my uniform sets, the one that looked no different from the others. I checked myself in the mirror and as always had to fix the glasses that slipped to the tip of my nose while I was packing my books.

Everything was just as usual and yet there was something different about that morning. My feelings. The nervousness that had me confusing Tuesday's set of books with Wednesday's. The absentmindedness that made me trip and lose my balance at least twice before I even left my room. The anxiety that twisted my stomach so hard I had to skip breakfast because no single bite of food could be forced down my throat.

But just as usual, I was driven to school by Mr. Lee in his old-fashioned Ford in the color of bottle green. All throughout the journey my eyes would blankly linger out of the window. Mr. Lee kept throwing glances at me through the rear view mirror, but no words were spoken.

My body on its own was loud enough to fill in the almost complete silence. In the car, the radio was playing so softly that I could hear the rush of my blood in my ears. I could hear how uneven my heartbeat was. I've never felt such excitement before. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. In fact, I felt like throwing up. Good thing that there was nothing but emptiness in my stomach. Not having breakfast in the morning never felt more beneficial.

There was a heavy lump in my throat, I felt like all my guts were twisting. I was excited to see him, I needed to. But at the same time I'd rather bury myself alive.

When we were passing by the entrance gate to park the car for me to get off, I already saw him. He was standing with his back leaned nonchalantly on the brick wall, earphones in, eyes closed. He ran his hand through his dark hair that was swaying with the wind. I felt like it was my heart that his hand caressed in that moment. A shiver shook my body. I looked away before my face turned entirely red.

When I got out of the car Mr. Lee said something but I wasn't listening. My eyes got attached to the guy and my mind went blank. He looked up and even though we were quite far away from one another, our eyes locked. I could feel it. My hand automatically went up, in a greeting gesture. Only when the guy did the same and my heart skipped a beat, did I realize what happened.

This brought back memories from Croatia. And just like back there and then, I once again had no control over my body. And it terrified me. "If it keeps happening whenever I'm with him, I'm scared to even think of what's to come," I worried silently as I walked towards him.

I didn't have to look at him to know he was there. Weirdly, I could feel his presence as deep as in my bones. I kept my eyes down, paying all of my attention to the tips of my shoes. Trying my hardest not to trip on anything. I only looked up when I could see the brick wall from the corner of my eye.

"So we finally meet," he said, taking out his earphones and putting them in his pocket. There was a hint of some emotion in the tone he spoke, but my mind was too focused on not going crazy to decipher what it was. It seemed like he was waiting for me to say something, but as nothing came out of my mouth he held out his hand, "I'm Kang Gook."

The first thing I noticed were the honorifics he dropped, but there was something more worthy my attention than that. His name. His soft voice rang in my ears, slowly reaching my brain smooth like a resonant lullaby. "Kang Gook" kept echoing in my head. The unique sounds were like tiny droplets of fresh water. They landed on the deep paint cracks on a portrait of someone who resembled the guy in front of me, and diluted it. New yet old, unknown yet familiar, the awakened thoughts slowly painted the long-forgotten memory of the guy standing in front of me in enhanced colors.